In one of those strange twists of linguistic chaos that exist in my childhood home - it's all handcream - whether you use it on your feet, or arms, or legs, or hands.

We are also talking about the man who got me saying "bluejeans" as all one word to refer to that type of clothing. The result is that if I see jeans in another colour I will call them, say "red bluejeans". Argh!!!!!