while looking about for a thread to bring back which hadn't gone all self-referential and/or pear-shaped, I was reminded how often haggis has been brought up here (no pun) in the past. in this happy vein I give you:

From "The Poems of Ewen McTeagle"

Horace

Much to his Mum and Dad's dismay,
Horace ate himself one day.
He didn't stop to say his grace,
He just sat down and ate his face.
"We can't have this!" his Dad declared,
"If that lad's ate, he should be shared."
But even as he spoke they saw
Horace eating more and more:
First his legs and then his thighs,
His arms, his nose, his hair, his eyes...

"Stop him someone!" Mother cried,
"Those eyeballs would be better fried!"
But all too late, for they were gone,
And he had started on his d___.
"Oh! foolish child!", the father mourns
"You could have deep-fried that with prawns,
Some parsley and some tartar sauce."
But H. was on his second course:
His liver and his lights, and lung,
His ears, his neck, his tongue...

"To think I raised him from the cot
And now he's going to scoff the lot!"
His Mother cried, "What shall we do?
What's left won't even make a stew..."
And as she wept, her son was seen
To eat his head, his heart, his spleen.
And there he lay, a boy no more,
Just a stomach on the floor...
Nonetheless, since it was his,
They ate it - that's what haggis is.

- Monty Python Calendar - April 2002


(ecch homo)