Foremost among my considerable collection of pet peeves is the word arguably. Look at it. It is ugly. The fad use of this ugly word introduces contention, without resolution, into the lyrical flow of sentences by the interjection of three harsh syllables (or four if you are from the south) to say little or naught. Besides, what ever happened to that nice word "perhaps"?
Until a minute ago I thought the use of this godawful word was limited to bureaucrats, politicians, National Public Radio commentators and others whose speech is largely bereft of meaning but burdened with new age buzz. Certainly I didn't expect to see the use of this vulgarism on the illustrious AWAD board.
It was Tsuwm. In a post in Q&A he wrote...
Paleontologist S.J.Gould, arguably, the most ...
"Nooooooooooo!" I screamed, scaring the cat. Not Tsuwm, hero to some, mentor to many, the Pooh-Bah voted most likely...no, not the great Tsuwm. The computer screen shuttered in disbelief, and then blinked off.
I sat alone in the darkened room overcome with sadness. Then, suddenly I brightened.
"That's it!" I cried, scaring the cat. Tsuwm, inarguably astute, had not used the A-word in vain after all. The inclusion of "arguably" was an important encoded personal message to me. I had been argueing with Faldage. So decoded, the word "arguably" reads...
Do not argue with Faldage, you will lose.
Outside my window the sun shines and birds sing and the great Tsuwm looks down from above and all is right with the world once again.
Milum.
