January 5, 2002

Dear A. Buro:

Your return address immediately smells suspicious to me. I do NOT believe you are who you SAY you are. Let me be firm on that account, although you could be a mad lady who wears moustaches?

Let me confer with a favorite attorney out of Chicago, Illinois, USA, to see whether his knowledge of foreign legal matters can reach our little village here outside of Chesterfield, England, with its Famous Crooked Squire. I am, I must admit, quite broke--Christmas account long cashed out, and my Chicago connection will most likely take on my case pro bono.

Don't mess around with me, A Bur' (in my side). I've got ways of discovering whether you're bona fide.

Simmering,
E. Beastly