And let Lord to the Manure born recuperate.
My cup runneth over with remorse, wwh, at any rate, I am sorry.
If AWADom was a monarchy, you would be my choice for King of the Castle. But, since it is not, could you give me an earl of your wisdom? To wit:
1. How does one become a peer of the realm, and does one have to be good at peering to qualify? Or is it a natural born talent? [Just kidding ... on both counts. I'm trying to get my manure together.]
2. How can you tell if a vassal is half-full or half- empty ... or, for that matter, just vassal-ating?
3. Can a vassal state a state of affairs to the state, or petition the state for a statement of its affairs, or otherwise complain that he is getting his knitting in a knot because he feels like he is being vassled, or, at any rate overly-vassaled, and why can't the lords tax someone else's thread every now and again? In the colonies, wwh, there is no tax at all without fair representation.
In summary, then, is there any hope of reigning in some of the mightiest lords for their threads are full and heavy laden with the fruits of many labors, whilst my poor thread is only heavy laden with their lordships. I would not presume to say that the peerage of my lords is fruitless, wwh, or their appearage either, only that my thread is fruitless and bears them little fruit. And oftimes I feel that I am being overly reigned-upon. That is all I have to say about the peerage, wwh, for the meanness of my tongue, which, by virtue of the title you have conferred upon me, has raised me far above my station, might cause me to offer offence where no offence was intended. Yet do I ask, wwh, if there are not greener pastures for the peerage to peer into, and also for their appearage ... tho I hasten to add that they are certainly welcome to peer and appear as they like. And, what is more, the more often the better ... if they come not to tax my coinage, for it is base mettle unseamly of their notice.
Having said so much to so little avail, wwh, may I leave you with this morsel of levity to ease the burdens of your heavy office? My gentle jocularity about the peers of the realm, brings to mind a British sex scandal many years ago involving a Minister of the Crown (who was also a peer of the realm), Profumo by name, and two very lovely ladies, of notorious virtue, Christine Keeler and Mandy Rice Davies. I'm not quite sure what happened to Mandy but I do recall that there was a rumor circulating at the time that she was found bobbing under a pier. In closing, wwh, may I assure you, that, whilst I come to you cup in hand, my vassal run is over. And we are all the better for it. All of which is respectfully submitted.