Just goes to show you that many of us Americans are smug in our feeling that everyone in the world should know all about American culture, even though such Americanisms as Smokey Bear (he actually doesn't have a middle name, though my dictionary says his middle name is "the") are known worldwide.

OK. Let's try a story with an Australian flavor.

An English chap touring Australia became separated from his tour group and wandered through the Outback for the proverbial forty days and forty nights. During this whole ordeal, he was obsessed with having a nice cup of tea. Finally, he found a road and trudged down the road to the outskirts of a tiny town. There on the side of the road he spied a sign: Welcome to Mersey, compliments of the Mersey Tea Room.

Relieved beyond belief, he hied himself to the Tea Room and ordered a cup of the best tea in the house. The waiter returned a few moments later with an evil-looking concoction. Bits of hair and bone drifted through the brown liquid.

"My God, man," spluttered the Englishman, "what is this foul brew?"

The waiter replied with hauteur, "Sir, it is the specialty of the house -- a special tea made from koala bears. I suggest you try it." (The waiter was NOT Australian, I'm certain.)

Our hero took the first sip with trepidation, but soon found himself sipping steadily, since the tea was the best he had ever tasted. Smiling, he looked up at the waiter, "This was excellent. May I have another cup? But this time could you run it through a sieve or a coffee filter to get the solids out?"

"Sir," sniffed the waiter, "the koala tea of Mersey is not strained."


TEd