Dear Faldage: The females talk about colors, but a lot of their definitions are daffy. What a wide range of shades I have seen called beige! And just about nobody remembers it originally meant the color of undyed wool. A very large percentage of computers and monitors are housed in "beige" plastic. And all "sage" means to me is a kind of cheese I don't enjoy. As lord of the manor extorting sheep excrement from the peasants, you ought to have seen a lot of undyed wool.