"Should I kiss or not kiss?/Should I kiss on the lips or the cheek?/One cheek or two?/Should I contact or air-kiss?/Should I hug?/With or without mutual back-slapping?". The permutations of disastrous greetings/introductions are almost endless!Hi Marty,
I am assuming by your post that you do not live in a "kissing zone", and the phenomenon is relatively new. The rules are different depending upon which country you are in so you won't get a straight dictionary-like explanation. Here is what we (in Québec Drum
) usually stick to.
Men…a) do not kiss each other (well some do, but we won't talk about that here
)
b) kiss women family members and friends on both cheeks when greeting hello and goodbye but generally only when the women initiate it
c) shake hands with business associates/contacts et al
d) hug men only when the person is going through extremely troubling times (eg. death in family) and only when it is a family member or very close friend
d) shake hands with family members to congratulate them on good news
e) shake hands and do that "lean-in with one shoulder while still grasping the hand and tapping on the back thing", when they are congratulating a family member or close friend on good news (eg. wife just had baby, got married, and, and, well, that's about it. No other good news warrants all that touching)
Women…a) kiss family members and friends on both cheeks when greeting hello and goodbye
b) kiss on both cheeks and hug a person they particularly like if they have not seen each other for a while, if they see the person is in need of some emotional support (anything from a bad breakup to a death in family) if they are sharing happy news (pregnancies et al) and anytime they darn well feel like it.
c) in business - shake hands if relationship is, how can I explain this, if it is all lines and square corners.
- kiss on both cheeks when the relationship is friendly/business. But this is only when two French people are dealing with one another. There is no business kissing when English people are involved as they tend to be much more reserved.
Kissing on the lips is only done with a significant other
(how is that for covering all the bases).
