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Carpal Tunnel
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March 11 Edit Sent note to Editor of magazine and received this answer: Hello Ann,
No. Your story does not have to have an Irish theme - it can be on any subject, set in any context.
Good luck
GeorgeHere's a notice of a short story contest for anyone interested, I have no connection with the magazine or the sponsoring book store. Just making it available in case anyone interested. A WARM WELCOME FROM VIRTUAL IRELAND So you've got your eye on our $4,000 prize - well someone has to win it and there's no reason why it shouldn't be you. We've also got some great runner up prizes of Book Club parcels from our friends and sponsors, Kennys Book Shop, Galway, Ireland. We're serious about creating the best short story competition and we've even gathered together a formidable panel of internationally known judges, drawn from the world of Irish literature, including Mary A. Larkin (The Wasted Years), Colin Bateman (Divorcing Jack), Marie Jones (Stones in His Pockets), Paddy Logue (Being Irish), Keith Baker (Lunenburg), Des Kenny (Kennys Bookshop), Eamonn Mallie (Endgame in Ireland) and Bob Joyce (James Joyce Centre, Dublin). So go on, impress us with your stories. They can be in any style or genre and you have until 31st May 2002 to enter, but there's no time like the present. Judging will be completed by the end of August and the winners announced on the Virtual Ireland web site in early September. 'It could be you' !! Okay, it's now over to you - Below you will find a copy of the officialRules & Conditions, giving details of story length, entry fee etc.. If you want more useful information on how you can submit your story online or download an official Entry Form pay us a visit here: http://www.virtualireland.com/story/default.asp?page=comp&sstory=introSo happy writing and Good Luck ! George Larmour Editor - Virtual Ireland. Email: george@virtualireland.com
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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Wow, thanks, wow!
I'm thinking of CapK condensing his travelogue (10% fee for the idea and another 20% for editing, right, Cap?)
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Carpal Tunnel
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Editing? What editing?  Besides, the only Irish stories I know don't exactly reflect glory on Ireland and the Irish, begorrah! 
The idiot also known as Capfka ...
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Besides, the only Irish stories I know don't exactly reflect glory on Ireland and the Irish, begorrah! Well, top of the morning, CapK!! Sure and bejabers you'd be right there to be sure, to be sure. I'm off for a jar.  
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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Yep, jest what oi expected, to be sure! See, oi was roight!
The idiot also known as Capfka ...
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Carpal Tunnel
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How neat. We have some pretty good storytellers among us, who will pick up the baton?
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Carpal Tunnel
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the only Irish stories I know don't exactly reflect glory on Ireland and the Irish, begorrah
Hey! that could be the winner! We Irish love to castigate ourselves.
Checking OED I discover castigate also means to "correct, revise, and emend (a literary work.) -3rd definition - How 'bout that!
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Carpal Tunnel
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What I was trying to say - and failed to achieve - was that I know a lot of Irish jokes, but I wouldn't presume to try to write Irish-style literature!
The idiot also known as Capfka ...
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Pooh-Bah
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The serially written story staterd by Jazzo some while ago just has to be a strong contender - trouble is, how and where do we share the prize?
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old hand
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The serially written story staterd by Jazzo some while agoWhich one do you mean? Neither of them really came to much of a conclusion. 
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The serially written story staterd by Jazzo some while ago just has to be a strong contender - trouble is, how and where do we share the prize?
Well, if it's to be an Irish short story it must include a 19th century character called Miles who goes about his business carrying a pig under his arm. We still continue this tradition to this day - except now we call the 'pig' a porkfolio. That's how it got it's name, kids!
Perhaps we can share the pig as a prize???
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What I was trying to say - and failed to achieve - was that I know a lot of Irish jokes, but I wouldn't presume to try to write Irish-style literature!Well, with Paddy's day fast approaching you may, or may not, be aware that el presidente de los estados unidos (as his sister-in-law calls him), traditionally holds a big shindif in the white house for the Irish political leaders and the Irish-American glitterati. Past incumbents have looked forward to this as the highlight of the year and revel in their Irishness (or part-Irishness at least). Last year was Dubya's first outing in the Green seat, however, and he was more then a little uncomfortable being in the presence of so many eloquent speakers and so remained quiet throughout. One of the Dublin politicians approached him during the party and asked him why he wasn't talking to anyone to which he replied - 'because I've been told that I speak the way that your Mr. Joyce writes'.Classic. ps I know a lot of Irish jokes, too!! Unfortunately I have to work with them.
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What I was trying to say - and failed to achieve - was that I know a lot of Irish jokes, but I wouldn't presume to try to write Irish-style literature!
Well, now that you mention it here's an Irish-style Irish joke..... [thirty shades of green emoticon]
Paddy and Mick are walking home after a night on the beer.
They've got no money to get a taxi and are staggering all over the place when they find themselves outside the bus depot. Paddy has a brainwave and says to Mick "Get in there and steal a bus so we can drive home and I'll stay out here and look out for the gards".
Mick duly breaks into the garage and is gone for twenty minutes while Paddy is wondering what the hell he's doing. Eventually Paddy sticks his head around the door and sees Mick running from bus to bus and looking very worried.
"What the hell are you doing Mick, get a move on!" to which Mick replies "I can't find a number 7 anywhere Paddy" whereupon Paddy,holding his hands to his head in disbelief, shouts "You fecking eejit Mick, steal a number 9 and we'll get off at the roundabout and walk the rest of the way!"
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