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Dear plutarch: you begin to remind me of the Indian in one of Abe Lincoln's anecdotes. The preacher had chided the Indian for loudly advocating a violent end to one of his enemies. The preacher said that if he prayed tor good things to happen to his enemy, it would bring down coals of fire on his enemy's head. The Indian prayed so loud and long for blessings on his enemy that the preacher finally asked him why he was praying so long. The Indian replied: "Me burnum down to stump."
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Very good, wwh. I was tempted to do something with that "stump" image but I have restrained myself. Your Abe Lincoln anecdote reminds me of another. Abe compared a pompous opponent he once knew with a little barge with a big horn which worked the Mississippi in his youth. Every time the barge blew its horn, it came to a halt. Lots of noise, no work. Also reminds me of a line from GBS (Major Barbara) but I'd have to look it up to do justice to the quote.
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Carpal Tunnel
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And let Lord to the Manure born recuperate.
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And let Lord to the Manure born recuperate.My cup runneth over with remorse, wwh, at any rate, I am sorry. If AWADom was a monarchy, you would be my choice for King of the Castle. But, since it is not, could you give me an earl of your wisdom? To wit: 1. How does one become a peer of the realm, and does one have to be good at peering to qualify? Or is it a natural born talent? [Just kidding ... on both counts. I'm trying to get my manure together.] 2. How can you tell if a vassal is half-full or half- empty ... or, for that matter, just vassal-ating? 3. Can a vassal state a state of affairs to the state, or petition the state for a statement of its affairs, or otherwise complain that he is getting his knitting in a knot because he feels like he is being vassled, or, at any rate overly-vassaled, and why can't the lords tax someone else's thread every now and again? In the colonies, wwh, there is no tax at all without fair representation. In summary, then, is there any hope of reigning in some of the mightiest lords for their threads are full and heavy laden with the fruits of many labors, whilst my poor thread is only heavy laden with their lordships. I would not presume to say that the peerage of my lords is fruitless, wwh, or their appearage either, only that my thread is fruitless and bears them little fruit. And oftimes I feel that I am being overly reigned-upon. That is all I have to say about the peerage, wwh, for the meanness of my tongue, which, by virtue of the title you have conferred upon me, has raised me far above my station, might cause me to offer offence where no offence was intended. Yet do I ask, wwh, if there are not greener pastures for the peerage to peer into, and also for their appearage ... tho I hasten to add that they are certainly welcome to peer and appear as they like. And, what is more, the more often the better ... if they come not to tax my coinage, for it is base mettle unseamly of their notice. Having said so much to so little avail, wwh, may I leave you with this morsel of levity to ease the burdens of your heavy office? My gentle jocularity about the peers of the realm, brings to mind a British sex scandal many years ago involving a Minister of the Crown (who was also a peer of the realm), Profumo by name, and two very lovely ladies, of notorious virtue, Christine Keeler and Mandy Rice Davies. I'm not quite sure what happened to Mandy but I do recall that there was a rumor circulating at the time that she was found bobbing under a pier. In closing, wwh, may I assure you, that, whilst I come to you cup in hand, my vassal run is over.  And we are all the better for it. All of which is respectfully submitted.
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plut, as lawyers like you and I say, let's look at the record.
Given that you have penned 28 (!) of the 53 previous posts in this thread, it semms just a wee tad inaccurate of you to say, my poor thread is only heavy laden with their lordships. ... I feel that I am being overly reigned-upon ... being overly-vassaled, ... tax without fair representation."
The facts appear to be contrary to you claim, plutarch. Methinks the gentleman doth protest too much. Perhaps you might rein yourself in a bit?
and btw, it is presumed -- without the need for futher comment -- that your Profumo reference was not intended to impugn the sexual morality of members of this board.
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a wee tad inaccurate of you to say, my poor thread is only heavy laden with their lordships.
Depends on whether you count number of posts, word count in posts or content.
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I propose a fiefdom, right here in the land of Miscellany, to be presided over by plutarch -- a plutarchy as it were. he could call it the Kingdom of Chatalot and he would be (per force) King Plu, the Perfect. he would be free to appoint all of his own courtiers; I envision a Duke of Earl, a Duchess of Kenspeckle, a Marquis de Sad le Lac, a Sir Gar de Loo, a Lady b'Goode.... mayhap I could be the curt jester or word fool -- but I presume too much.
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Hey, fellas, down more wine to mellow the mood. I hurriedly renounce any claim to precedence of any sort. And I swear on a stack of Bibles that I do not wish to offend anybody. All I want is lots of threads that may enable me to make ridiculous replies. Alphatists, where are you?
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Alphatists, where are you?
Rat cheer, Dr. Bill (see lipogram thread). And glad to be back, I think.
Meanwhile, some time ago there was talk about creating AWArDs for illustrious moments in this board's history: Best Pun, Most Interesting Thread, etc. I would hereby like to create the Best Exercise in Pointlessness AWArD and nominate this thread for it.
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Dear AnnaStrophic: I applaud your new thread, though I lack the talent to comment cleverly on it. Mes talents ont leur bornes.
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