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#34225 07/27/01 04:58 PM
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wwh Offline
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Lots of chicanery in the bottled water business. A supermarket in Massachusetts sold bottled water labelled "Pure Spring Water". When a customer discovered that they were taking the water right out of the tap in the stores, the supermarket's defence was that the town claimed its water was from a pure spring.


#34226 07/28/01 09:46 PM
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wow Offline
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decaf beans brew up into pale insipid dishwater coffee.. I like my coffee rich, strong and dark*-- half french roast columbian .. half dark roast
Oh, Helen, weep for me.
Doctor took me off "real" coffee after a couple of tachycardia episodes. (I like coffee your way!)
And if that doesn't cause you to cry, consider :
I cannot have chocolate either. (tears in eyes -e) Seems both caffeine and chocolate can cause tachycardia.
On upside : I have found that Maxwell House french roast decaf is prety good ... five big scoops for four cups! And if you cannot have regular ... My son tells me Port City Roasters, local coffee roaster, makes good decaf. So I'll try that too.

Regular, in New England, is with cream and sugar. When I was in Texas I ordered a regular coffee and got black . No cream or sugar.
And coffee in the military, any branch is weak and awful... I guess they make it weak because they drink so much...and think they're getting less caffeine .... little do they know!
(/RANT)



#34227 07/29/01 05:15 PM
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I think this qualifies (quoted from his travelogue):
Still haven’t seen anything as quirky in the cemetery line as the one we passed which had parking spaces outside it with signs saying “Residents Only” standing guard over them.



#34228 03/28/02 08:51 PM
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enthusiast
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Sorry to resurrect such an old thread, but it seemed the proper place for this (plus I thought some of the newer folks might enjoy it). Today my dad had some mulch delivered to our house, and the receipt contained the following disclaimer:

Product must be pickupd in 14 days of invoice. If not PU'd in 14 days. This PU slip is invalid and you forfeit your product and lose your money.


#34229 03/28/02 09:02 PM
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Product must be pickupd in 14 days of invoice.

Eewww. Anyone knows it's pickupped.

I've seen backup used as a verb and both backuped and backupped as the past tense.


#34230 03/29/02 01:51 PM
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addict
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Saw a hand-written sign at a car sales in some whistle-stop in the Oklahoma Panhandle the other day which read "Cheap cars. Be quick. They won't last".

Fiat tried to launch their Nova brand in Mexico. They didn't sell a single car. In Spanish 'No va' means 'Won't go'.


#34231 03/29/02 09:21 PM
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newbie
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"Cheap cars. Be quick. They won't last."

Not sure it was as English error actually.


Here are a few other examples of bad sentence structure:

outside a secondhand shop:
we exchange anything - bicycles, whashing machines, etc.
why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain?

sign in a laundromat:
automatic washing machines
please remove all your clothes when the light goes out

spotted in a toilet in a London block:
toilet out of order. please use floor below.


And finally, something that ties in more to the theme of this thread:
sign on a repair shop door:
we can repair anything.
(please knock hard on the door - the bell doesn't work)


#34232 03/30/02 12:34 AM
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Rapunzel, you musta read my mind. I saw these three signs in succession in Tennesee (or was it Kentucky?):

Whoa, Baby, Whoa
Leave the racing to the horses
Begin construction zone

I had thought to resurect this thread to post them, but thankyou, thankyou, thankyou. No need to search it out!


#34233 03/30/02 01:29 AM
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Whoa, Baby, Whoa
Leave the racing to the horses

That would be Kentucky. "Go, baby, go" was last year's Derby theme.


#34234 03/30/02 02:21 PM
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old hand
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Here's a couple for you...

(1) We are always sposed to be SSSOOO impressed when told that our new product "...will be installed by professionals".

To my mind this claim simply means the blokes doing the installing are being paid - probably by the customer.

(2) When I was in my late teens I noticed a handwritten sign at a second hand book store - "Comics Wanted"

I went in and applied for the job. The cretin behind the counter thought I was a cretin!

Apologies to those with long memories - these are both "deja vu" posts!

stales




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