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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 2,661
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 2,661 |
In the far away land of Trid there lived an ogre. Not just any ogre. This one had size 14 shoes and he was fast. To ease the growing pains when he was young, he learned that he could kick something and it would numb the hurting. He never lost his habit of kicking things, and when he got his first gig of terrorizing the good people of Trid at the Brookin Bridge, it became his signature toll: you may pass but I’m gonna kick you in the ass. Most people thought it was a small price to pay until they got one of those size 14’s up the wazoo. The people would be willing to try the trip once or twice but the people of Trid were basically a lazy bunch, and sitting around on their collective butts hadn't become fun anymore.
One day a rabbi came to town on a pilgrimage and was greeted by apologies about the toll fee. The rabbi responded that he had not paid a fee. Well, the town elders, a bit surprised, went along with the rabbi to see if this had become true. They all walked up to edge of the Brookin Bridge, and the fastest of the elders took a run across the bridge. He barely got half way across and the ogre buzzed out from under and planted a stiff kick on his backside, and just as quickly disappeared. The rabbi ran accross to help the elder up to his feet, and to the ammazement of all else, the ogre did not appear. The rabbi walked to the middle of the bridge and yelled over the side to the ogre “ Why do you allow me to pass unscathed yet no others?” . A tiny voice from the under the bridge proclaimed ”Silly rabbi, kicks are for Trids".
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 87
journeyman
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journeyman
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 87 |
(Sound of rummaging off stage.)
Our hero: Drat, misplaced the clippers again.
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 618
addict
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addict
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 618 |
We are all familiar with the great deeds of Mahatma Ghandi. And it is a well known fact that he used to walk around without shoes, to better understand the suffering of others. As such, over time his feet became very hard. He also went on numerous hunger strikes in protest over the treatment of his people. He hence was very weak and often poorly. And when he did eat, his diet was poor, as he had given away all of his money to help others. Because of his poor diet, he also developed bad breath.
He was a much loved man, and was known to all his friends as ... wait for it ...
a super-calloused fragile mystic with plagues of halitosis.
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