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RARITY - RASP

Our limericks come with such rarity,
And they show a profound lack of clarity.
With a rasp in our voice
Do we now make a choice
Among grossness, or sex, or hilarity...


REPARTEE - REVOKE

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The Church was induced to revoke
Its ban on archbishops who joke.
Since then, on TV,
We've heard repartee
From sundry episcopal folk.

CANDLE – CAPACIOUS

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They told me the house was capacious,
But sadly that claim was fallacious.
The doors had no handle,
The light was by candle,
And floorboards were missing. Good gracious!

FERRY – FEVERISH

A C Bowden #222296 09/21/15 06:53 AM
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old hand
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The Exxon Valdez – now a ferry –
Transports those more cheapskate than wary.
At the bridge, dude is feverish,
Runs her over a beaver –squish!
But no oil's spilled: it's sanitary.

GOUGE – GRAIN

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In Ivan the Terrible's reign,
Your views had to go with the grain.
If the Tsar or his minions
Disliked your opinions,
They'd gouge out a chunk of your brain.

TIGHTROPE – TINNY

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...not.

An aspiring conductor named Ginny
Had a musical ear that was tinny.
And she flew in a pet
When her best review yet
Called her "...certainly no Toscanini!"

HAPPILY - HAZARDOUS


Edit: Wha? No tightrope! Never mind. I'll try again later.

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An aspiring conductor named Ginny
Had a musical ear that was tinny.
A tightrope performer
Called down through a dormer:
"That noise makes me wobble, you ninny!"

HAPPILY – HAZARDOUS

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Yeah, like that.

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I heard a spectator exclaim:
"This rugby's a hazardous game!
But back in my day,
I'd happily play –
We were light, and the risks weren't the same".

FLANK – FLOORBOARD

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The car hurtled out from the bank,
Scraped the brick wall on its starboard flank.
Its speed was untoward;
Wheelman hit the floorboard
With his wingtips, so utterly swank.

BELITTLE – BEND

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