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journeyman
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journeyman
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Does anyone remember Tom Swifties or are you trying to forget?
So old, it's time for a rerun? -- or YART and Yawn?
Here are examples. No explanations needed.
"I'm shot in the chest," sid Tom, whole-heartedly.
"Someone stole the spare," said Tom tirelessly.
"This oxygen mask doesn't work," said Tom breathlessly.
"Someone threw me down the stairs," said Tom dejectedly.
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Heh... i love 'em! "I've got a lock on the target," Tom said insightfully "Let's blow up these paddies," Tom said derisively "I'm impotent," Tom said softly (  ) "Where can I find a copper figure of Lincoln?" Tom asked innocently funny stuff 
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Carpal Tunnel
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"I'm impotent," Tom said softly "I'm certainly not!" said Tom stiffly.( )
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"Only few more miles to go," Tom said jauntily.
"You promised these photos would be ready in an hour," Tom said expressively.
"I'm the best engraver you'll ever find," Tom said impressively.
"I've found a suitable plot for you and your husband," Tom said gravely.
[hits "continue" before she can think better of it]
Ali
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"This chair's very comfortable", said Tom cheekily.
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Pooh-Bah
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"Gotta run!", said Tom swiftly.
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veteran
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"Stand back from that harvesting machine!" cried Tom disarmingly.
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"The room is well lit." Tom remarked brightly.
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"The bulb burned out," said Tom darkly.
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preparing dinner always leads me to think of the strangest things; today my mind went inexplicably back to Tom Swifties... but this time with a personal twist: "Plaintiff has no legal ground on which to base his complaint", said Sparteye demure(r)ly "I'm afraid we'll have to amputate from the elbow down," said Dr. Bill disarmingly "I need some help decorating this altar," said Father Steve crossly. "Environmental issues are deserving of our attention," said Hyla conservatively. anyone care to add?
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old hand
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"This group convenes four times a year", said Max quorderly.
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"We'll have to amputate from the arm up," said bridge-it allarmingly
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"You'll have to lie to your wife to spend time with me," said Fiber babily [RunForCoverIcon]
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"The bulb burned out," said Tom darkly. "But I can see in the dark!" said Sparteye brightly.
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"I've been riding all night," said maverick hoarsly.
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"What's an insomniac tenor on an Island?" asked Inselpeter tuckeredly.
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"I'm as sane as the next person!" cried David dementedly.
The idiot also known as Capfka ...
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addict
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"This pub's no good" said Tom innocuously.
or as Enigma wants it:
"This pub's [puberty] no good" said Tom innocuously.
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“I’ve put on some weight,” says Tom em phatically. [runs away to hide emoticon  ]
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"I'll never get this job finished if you don't leave me alone" Tom said doggedly.
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"Damn it! I just broke my pencil!", Tom snapped.
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"Is this a dagger that I see before me?" asked McTom, pointlessly.
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"Out, out, damned spot!" barked Ms McT diabolically.
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"I don't want to go fishing today," Tom carped.
wow
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"The harvest's going to be spoiled this year," Tom whined.
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"The harvest's going to be spoiled this year," Tom whined. "So, we might as well plan on making vinegar," he added sourly.
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"Don't ask, don't tell," said Tom plumbly
"What's wrong, Blanche?" asked Tom eerily.
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"So, we might as well plan on making vinegar," he added sourly
"... to put on our potatoes," chipped in Young Tom.
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"So, we might as well plan on making vinegar," he added sourly
"... to put on our potatoes," chipped in Young Tom.
"Fried foods are not heatly" said Mother Swift crisply.
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"So, we might as well plan on making vinegar," he added sourly
"... to put on our potatoes," chipped in Young Tom.
"Fried foods are not heatly" said Mother Swift crisply.
"Indeed, they can cause cardiac problems," said tom arrestingly
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<<"Fried foods are not heatly" said Mother Swift crisply.>>
"Tell me about your mother," said Tom analytically
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"Fried foods are not heatly" said Mother Swift crisply.
"Indeed, they can cause cardiac problems," said tom arrestingly.
"And obesity" Mother seconded ponderiously.
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"This is a very SMALL railway station " said Tom haltingly
Rod Ward
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Especially since the apple market is in such a state of flux, he said acidly.
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"Does y'all got a hatchet I could borry?" Tom aksed.
"The explosion completely destroyed the 747," Maj. Tom Swift of the NTSB explained.
I'm completely thumbing my nose at Fate with that last one -- I'm flying out of town tomorrow!
On a wing and a prayer,
Flatlander
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"I hope your flight is safe. And good luck joining the Mile High Club!", Tom ejaculated.
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"Beat that one, if you can," said Sparteye stiffly.
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"With one hand tied behind my back," she responded disarmingly.
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tied...
“I cannot, in all impossibility, really fail to not understand how you came not down with such an unserious, not to say, not magnificently not unlaughworthy line” said maverick knottily
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"Its like a clarion to me." said Tom clearly.
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alternatively
"It's hardly worth the effort," said sparteye wiltingly
This is Binky, wishing you a pleasant from the rings of Saturn, signing off.
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journeyman
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Things are fast getting out of control, said old-fashioned Tom, swiftly.(but, oh, you kids!!!)
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the theme of the June 6, 2001 NYTimes crossword was... wait for it...
Tom Swifties,
he stated tangentially.
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the theme of the June 6, 2001 NYTimes crossword was…Tom Swifties,
This will have been the two-month-delayed-for-the-residents-of-the-hinterlands June 6th NY Times crossword puzzle, he asked hesitantly?
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journeyman
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"They're going to hang me in the morning," said Tom, duly.
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Thanks for bringing the Kingston Trio back into my head
Better you should check out the Doc Watson version, Max.
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"The Merry Minuet""The Merry Minuet" is a great tune, Max! "An' I dun't like enybuddy very much!" said Tom, whistling unsociably.  A few more "Swifties" since I missed 'em the first go-round: I hate the Arctic, Tom stated coldly. Like a cold day in hell, Tom jeered ambiguously. I graduated cum laude, Tom boasted smartly. We survived the hurricane, Tom gasped windily. I'm grasping for straws, Tom said while tending bar... So I'm signing off till I have something better than straws to offer!--Tom said withdrawingly.
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I got this and wanted to share-- I thought of putting it in with shaggy dogs-- but thought it was better here...
Recent reports indicate the Japanese banking crisis shows no signs of· improving.
following last week's news that Origami Banks has folded, it was learned today that Sumo Bank has gone belly up.
Bonsai Bank plans to cut some of its branches, and Karaoke Bank is up for sale and is going for a song.
Meanwhile, shares in Kamikaze Bank have nose-dived and 500 jobs at Karate Bank will be chopped.
Analysts report there is something fishy going on at Sushi bank and staff there fear they may be getting a raw deal."
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Please put that piston down, said Tom disarmingly.
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journeyman
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journeyman
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Someone metntioned this, but I neglected to obtain a copy of it. Can any one of you technically-skilled types furnish a copy, a link or a keyword? TIA
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"My rooster crows every morning," said Tom cockily.
"I can teach you to play the piano," said Tom grandly.
"I never believed in magic spells," said Tom charmingly.
"Someone stole my camera," said Tom candidly.
"I have to make a phone call," said Tom crankily.
"Let's play one more round of cards," said Tom wistfully.
"It's too big to fit through the door," said Tom awkwardly.
"I have darjeeling or earl grey," said Tom teasingly.
"Mulled wine helps me sleep," said Tom groggily.
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I have a cough, said Tom phlegmatically.
I hate cats, said Tom doggedly
My honour is everything, said Tom disreputably
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"I can't think of anything to say," said Tom wordlessly.
formerly known as etaoin...
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