|
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 12
stranger
|
OP
stranger
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 12 |
Hello linguaphiles!
I'm back with a few more linguistic dilemmas. I hope you will be able to help. I'm writing an academic paper and have just received some feedback on my current draft. There are a few things I haven't been able to solve or figure out on my own. Here are the problems I need your help with:
1.) Consider the following sentence: "The internationalization theories focusing on multinational companies are often called the economic approach." My professor has marked this sentence and commented that the English here is wrong. For the life of me I can't figure out what is wrong and why? Can you?
2.) Consider the following: "Europe is often overlooked when going international. While being closest and therefore more economically achievable, it is a mixture of different cultures to master." My professor has marked the word "achievable" and stated that this is the wrong word. Why is it wrong to use achievable in this sentence (I thought it was a good choice)? Can you suggest better alternatives?
3.) Consider the following sentence: "The purpose of a case study is not to generalize the results of the study, but rather to give good theoretical statements based on the study results." My professor has marked "good theoretical statements based on the study results" and commented that it doesn't good. Do you agree? And if so, how would you formulate this sentence?
4.) Consider the following sentence: "Besides, every stage of this process involves a good knowledge of international business environments, such as political, economic, legal and cultural issues." My professor has crossed out "a" before "good knowledge". Is it really wrong to use "a" here? If yes, why?
I really hope you will be able to help and offer your opinions. I'm looking forward to hearing from you!
Happy weekend, Heni
|
|
|
|
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 13,803
Carpal Tunnel
|
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 13,803 |
First question; what kind of professor is this? English? Linguistics? Economics?
Statement 1) looks like the kind that a rabid prescrip would gladly expend the effort required to misunderstand. The juncture of "multinational companies" and "are often called the economic approach" lends itself to this purposeful misunderstanding. Beyond that I leave it to the more attuned to this sort of thing to comment.
Regarding statement 2) I might suggest 'accessible' rather than 'achievable.'
Statement 3) is a little awkward but it would take some thought to fix it.
The "a" in statement 4) looks perfectly good to me but I might change "knowledge" to "understanding".
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 12
stranger
|
OP
stranger
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 12 |
Thank you very much, Faldage, for your input. I'm writing a paper in Economics, and my professor is a professor of Economics. He earned his PhD at Columbia University (in the States), so I strongly suspect he is fluent in English. Even though I am not writing a paper in English or Linguistics, my professor tends to place great emphasis on the language of the paper.
Heni
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 2,154
Pooh-Bah
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 2,154 |
For 3 the sentance might look neater if you drop the last "study" since it is obvious what results you mean.
"The purpose of a case study is not to generalize the results of the study, but rather to give good theoretical statements based on the results."
|
|
|
|
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 13,803
Carpal Tunnel
|
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 13,803 |
I still think it's a little awkward and probably doesn't even say what's meant. See if this is what should really be said:
"The purpose of a case study in not just to generate results, but rather to give data on which good theoretical statements can be based."
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 456
addict
|
addict
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 456 |
[Shifting to hypercritical mode to try to discern the heartburn sources:]
1.) The snag seems to be converting a multiple (theories) into a singular thing (approach); not wrong but arguably awkward.
2.) 'Achievable' carries an expectation of regard to some sort of action; to characterize Europe as achievable sounds a bit non-sequitur.
3.) For a study to "give...statements" smacks of being too direct a relation, such as by cause and effect. An improvement could be for a study to 'form the basis of theories' or 'illustrate trends'.
4.) Again, not really wrong, but knowledge being like 'stuff' makes the 'a' a bit off. Possibly better would be 'thorough knowledge' sans 'a'; Fal's suggestion was even better.
ÅΓª╥┐↕§
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 557
addict
|
addict
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 557 |
I know nothing about the subject and what the jargon and "stock phrases" might be, but going purely on logic alone:
1) Taking out the qualifying clause, we have "The internationalization theories are often called the economic approach." I don't see how theories can be an approach. Things are not a process. Something more like "Theorizing on internationalization is often called the economic approach." It seems unlikely like that "the economic approach" consists of all possible "internationalization theories focusing on multinational companies" which I think the sentence could imply.
2) Depends on your meaning: viable, feasible, valuable?
3) Let's substitute some words: The purpose of a story is not to summarize itself. Tautology. That's not a very informative statement. As far as "good", are "good theoretical statements" good in theory or good in practice? What kind of good, i.e. would just changing good to something more specific help?
4) Is there more than one kind of "good knowledge"? Every stage involves six good knowledges of ... Again good is vague. And is there more than one international business environment? Would "involves in-depth knowledge of the international business environment" be better?
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 2,154
Pooh-Bah
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 2,154 |
Faldages version is definitely an improvement over mine. Much neater.
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 12
stranger
|
OP
stranger
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 12 |
I have been absent from the boards for a few days, but I was really excited to see so many responses to my linguistic dilemmas. Thanks everyone for sharing your thoughts! You have all been so helpful in my quest to figure out how to improve my paper. I owe you big time! :-) Thanks, guys!
Heni
|
|
|
Forums16
Topics13,913
Posts229,756
Members9,187
|
Most Online3,341 Dec 9th, 2011
|
|
0 members (),
374
guests, and
5
robots. |
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
|
|