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Joined: Jan 2007
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stranger
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You know how exciting it is when you discover there's a word for something you've always wanted to be able to describe? Like "petrichor", for example. Does anyone know if there's a word that describes the feeling of being embarrassed for someone else--like when someone makes a fool of themselves or is humiliated? Not quite pity, but not really embarrassment either. I've wanted to be able to describe this for years.

Thanks!

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Pooh-Bah
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Hi wellymabel.

I don't have the word you seek, although I certainly have plenty of use for it. If some kind soul could point us in the right direction, I could have a code word for my husband when we are out in public.

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Carpal Tunnel
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compassion?

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addict
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You sound like Steffie from White Noise by Don DeLillo.

Quote:

Steffie is slightly younger than Denise, a sensitive child who, while watching television with her family, ''becomes upset when something shameful or humiliating seems about to happen to someone on the screen'' and stands outside the room while Denise gives a running commentary on the action.

—NY Times




I'd call it vicarious embarrassment.

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old hand
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the feeling of being embarrassed for someone else is not unfamiliar to me. But on closer inspection, I think we are mostly embarassed for ourselves by the actions of the other.

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Pooh-Bah
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Try Googling as follows: embarrassment intitle:synonyms


dalehileman
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Empathy would include "vicarious embarrassment" but also any other emotion. Empathbarrassment? (^_^)

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Carpal Tunnel
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Quote:

Hi wellymabel.

I don't have the word you seek, although I certainly have plenty of use for it. If some kind soul could point us in the right direction, I could have a code word for my husband when we are out in public.




<snortle>

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Carpal Tunnel
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Not a single word we have for this feeling, but the standing definition is 'substituted shame'. Too long for English use , I guess.

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Quote:

the feeling of being embarrassed for someone else is not unfamiliar to me. But on closer inspection, I think we are mostly embarassed for ourselves by the actions of the other.




Right string, right yo-yo, wsieber.
By social extention we are embarrassed for ourselves.

For example, the same faux pas that enjoins our empathy when committed by a member of the in-group is often cause for a giggle or grin when commited by a member of the out-group.

Either way we here are guilty of a snide paternalism in that we are holding ourselves to be superior to those who simply don't know the social conventions of the nonce.

Now you all go forth from these pages and become better people. ()

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