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Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 6,296
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 6,296 |
Consuelo writes in orange:
After eight years of excavations, archaeologists have uncovered remains such as peppercorns, wine, beads, sapphires(,?) and teak and metal from ships.
And she (you, Consuelo) asks about the teak and metal from ships--how to show that the ships were made, we assume, from teak and metal.
Here's one of the possible new configurations:
After eight years of excavations, archaeologists have uncovered remains such as peppercorns, wine, beads, sapphires, and, from ships, teak and metal.
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Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 2,636
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 2,636 |
I thought of that too, but it seemed just as awkward as the original, to my ears. How about
After eight years of excavations, archaeologists have uncovered remains such as peppercorns, wine, beads, sapphires, and teak and metal from the remains of the ships.
I didn't read this particular article, but I have read others similar to this and am assuming that the remains were found in sunken ships that are currently being excavated. Is this the archeological site that was once a harbor and is now found on dry land?
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 1,055
old hand
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old hand
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 1,055 |
> it's my understanding that the teak and metal were both parts of ships excavated
No doubt. And in that sense, I don't see anything wrong with your first version, I just thought that's what got to IP. Your second version isn't poetry, but it IS easier to grasp on first reading, which is obviously of utmost importance in an article. So, I'd go for it:-)
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Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 2,379
Pooh-Bah
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OP
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 2,379 |
Now that it's past my bedtime, I can admit. The post was odder in the headline, where I found it, than in article itself, which I read only after posting--no doubt, it is a vice to be so eager.
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