Please tell me this is a joke!

I couldn't agree more!
I was obviously misinformed when I was told that if you make any name ending in "s" a possessive you can skip the second "s".

Using this approach James has what is James's, but this can instanteously change to James'.
And the same applies to Chris (Chris's/Chris'), Jess (Jess's/Jess'), Santos, etc.

I very much prefer that approach. And, to be honest, I'll probably stick with it in the hope it becomes accepted usage.

I'm pedantic enough about the correct use of its and it's !