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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 2,661
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 2,661 |
That's a stupid question!   With all these YARTless posts, I just ... couldn't... resist....ahhhh!
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Joined: Mar 2002
Posts: 1,692
Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Mar 2002
Posts: 1,692 |
lemme see if I got the idea: would do equally as well can be trimmed to equally well?You do have the idea. (got?)  dxb
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Joined: Jun 2000
Posts: 444
addict
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addict
Joined: Jun 2000
Posts: 444 |
ewein,
whatever else, congrats for trying! (I'm another renovated oldie, back after over six months off, so I'm crashing your party...)
First, a list of (alleged) performance evaluations which will fit in well with the insult theme (my personal favourites are 6,7,13,19,24 and 31);
1. “Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.”
2. “I would not allow this employee to breed.”
3. “This employee is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a definite won’t be.”
4. “Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap.”
5. “When she opens her mouth, it seems that it is only to change feet.”
6. “He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle.”
7. “This young lady has delusions of adequacy.”
8. “He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.”
9. “This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.”
10. “This employee should go far, and the sooner he starts, the better.”
11. “Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together.”
12. “A gross ignoramus - 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus.”
13. He doesn’t have ulcers, but he’s a carrier.”
14. “I would like to go hunting with him sometime.”
15. “He’s been working with glue too much.”
16. “He would argue with a signpost.”
17. “He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the room.”
18. “When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell.”
19. “If you see two people talking and one looks bored, he’s the other one.”
20. “A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on.”
21. “A prime candidate for natural de-selection.”
22. “Donated his brain to science before he was done using it.”
23. “Gates are down, the lights are flashing but the train isn’t coming.”
24. He’s got two brains, one is lost and the other is out looking for it.”
25. “If he were any more stupid, he’d have to be watered twice a week.”
26. “If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you’d get change.”
27. “If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean.”
28. “It’s hard to believe he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm.”
29. “One neuron short of a synapse.”
30. “Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only gargled.”
31. “Takes him two hours to watch 60 minutes.”
32. “The wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead.”
Second, one of the few responses that actually managed to shut me up. Can't remember who said it, but all my firends agree it's apt.
Me: 'if you want my opinion...'
Interrupting friend: 'Yeah, why not, you have so many you won't miss one.'
Finally, a comment about what counts as a 'successful' post. Don't get too hung up on the numbers. It's quality not quantity. Just one really apt reply which makes you laugh, makes you think or answers your question so clearly that no-one else needs to add to it is a success.
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Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 184
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OP
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Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 184 |
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 13,858
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 13,858 |
Dear bridget and ewein: Since the board is very slow, perhaps you will allow me to intrude. The list of insulting evaluations is really a list of stupid mid-managers. The next higher authority reading them is not interested in amusing insults. but looking for specifics to support a parsonnel action. The person writing such an evaluation may be cutting his own throat.
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Joined: Jun 2000
Posts: 444
addict
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addict
Joined: Jun 2000
Posts: 444 |
The list of insulting evaluations is really a list of stupid mid-managers... ...may be cutting his own throat.wwh, I couldn't agree more, hence the 'alleged' in my initial post. I was putting it forward more for content than provenance. 
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 137
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 137 |
I don't usually collect insults but the list reminded me of something my father said once, he referred to an ex-student of his as the finest argument for retro-active birthcontrol he'd ever met. We were in a restaurant at the time and the waitress was just coming to the table, she had to turn around she started laughing so hard. I think I remember it more for her reaction than anything else.
I'm partial to not the sharpest tool in the shed.
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Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 3,439
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 3,439 |
Just a quick post because all of you are having so much fun it's hard to resist joining in!
Instead of straight out insults there is the euphemistic insult ... calls for a bit of thought but it's fun.
My all time favorite for an employee reference letter :
"He will be hard to replace."
Ouch!
As to how many posts to success .... just posting makes a success. It takes courage!
Oh, if you go to your profile and click on preferences you can put in the number of posts-per-page that you want. Makes browsing a bit easier. I've found 50 per page is easy to manage.
Enjoy yourself and go with blessings from this old time poster!
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