But mav, if we refuse to discuss our behavior and learn from it, we can expect the same behavior to occur again -- and again -- and again. Were we to cut off discussion only after modest goddess has left, all we accomplish is to let those who might have erred off the hook for their misbehavior. Edit: and by doing so -- by tacitly winking at it -- we encourage it.

I appreciate that any discussion may engender heat. But to cut of discussion for that reason is to say that for fear of screaming, we will allow the screamers free reign. [pun intended]