I found one! on Phrase Finder:

and the one with Bunky was by Eddie Lawrence entitled "The Old Philosopher".
: Lots of hits but no lyrics yet.

I guess you can tell its been a very very slooooow day today at work.

Here are the partial lyrics to one of the Philosopher songs. I saw that there were a series of Philosopher recordings.

Hello, there, my friend.
You say your old man dressed up as Santa Claus and can't get his belly
through the fireplace?
And you hang up a purple bulb on the tree and three thousand volts go
through ya?
And your brother made an animal cage out of your Erector set, and Grandma
can't get out?
And someone opened a window while you're sortin' stamps and all your triangles
are flying around the house?
And one of your gifts, a strange little shiny box, suddenly takes off and is
now circling the earth at twelve-hundred miles-an-hour?

Is that what's troublin' you, bunky?!?

WELL, PUT YOUR HEAD DOWN LOW AND TAKE A RUN FOR IT!! YOU'LL NEVER GIVE UP...NEVER GIVE UP...NEVER GIVE UP.....

THAT SHIP!!!

Yes! Now I remember! That was his classic sign-off, "Never Give Up...", and he always performed these "lyrics" to background musical accompaniment that was forlorn, exagerratingly sad.