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#60863 03/14/2002 3:51 PM
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I have this screaming urge to point out that Faldage's faux insult to tsuwm is straight out of Rostand (1897).

no apologies to Steve Martin


#60864 03/14/2002 4:22 PM
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Once at a social gathering, Gladstone said to Disraeli,
"I predict, Sir, that you will die either by hanging or
of some vile disease". Disraeli replied, "That all
depends upon whether I embrace your principles or your
mistress".


#60865 03/14/2002 4:28 PM
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The following is attributed to Sam Rayburn, I believe:

A congressman entered a restaurant and, seeing his opponent seated at lunch, walked up behind him. "Sam," he said, putting his hand on the seated gent's bald head, "your head is as smooth as my wife's ass." Sam rubbed his own head for a second, and replied with a glint in his eye, "Why, so it is, Joe; so it is."


#60866 03/14/2002 4:34 PM
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>Faldage's faux insult to tsuwm

oh, thanks alot[sic], ASp, for opening up a passage for yet another shot in the shnoz from the drip.

http://home.mn.rr.com/wwftd/

#60867 03/14/2002 4:41 PM
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Excuse me, but all insults concerning oversize proboscises should properly be directed at me.

[mutter-mutter. toucan play that game, you know ...]


#60868 03/14/2002 8:03 PM
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Hey, Keiva! Has that bluebird family come back to resume residence in your shnoz...I mean yard?


#60869 03/14/2002 11:53 PM
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Hey, Maxie!
May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits!


#60870 03/15/2002 12:07 AM
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#60871 03/15/2002 1:43 PM
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> During cultural revolution in PRC a big insult was son of a dog

When I first learnt construction site Italian, I was struck by the frequent use of dio cani (dog god) to insult everybody and everything. If used in English the intended recipient would probably fall about the place laughing!

Mind you, the same education gave me "gutso" and "figa" (sp?? - never got spelling lessons on site). I've used these a million times since and felt greatly satisfied each time. And no I won't provide a translation. (Apologies to our resident Latins).

stales


#60872 03/15/2002 6:19 PM
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dio cani

Then there was the time during my brief foray at French in a semiformal setting when a classmate called me a radio network.

His pronunciation wasn't any too good.


#60873 03/20/2002 7:12 PM
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I have this screaming urge to point out that Faldage's faux insult to tsuwm is straight out of Rostand (1897).

By all means, release your screaming urges!

Although these may not specifically be insults, a couple oldies but goodies: When someone didn't hear what was said or missed the key point they are told to " get the s**t out of their ears" or if you are caught bulls**tting Mom used to say "Your so full of s**t your eyes are brown!"


#60874 03/20/2002 7:40 PM
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musick, here's a slighty less vivid variation on the same theme:

I'll bet things would sound vastly different if you wiped the rectal polyps out of your ears.

http://home.mn.rr.com/wwftd/

#60875 03/20/2002 8:18 PM
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if you wiped the rectal polyps out of your ears.


Or the closely related, your head's stuck so far up your ass you're looking out through your eyeballs. This can be shortened to the cryptic, you're really looking out through your eyeballs. This sounds almost like a compliment.


#60876 03/20/2002 8:26 PM
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"Or maybe your head is so far up your ass that the goo you comb from
your hair won't be $#!+ for three days."

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#60877 03/20/2002 8:33 PM
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Harrumph [on a PC and don't know the alt thang for marca registrada]


#60878 03/20/2002 9:33 PM
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That's the idea®

(&)(#)(174) (without"()")


#60879 03/21/2002 9:52 PM
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You're so far up yourself that you need to stick a toothbrush up your ass to clean your teeth.

May your ears turn into assholes and shit on your shoulders.

Not very savoury, but.



The idiot also known as Capfka ...
#60880 03/21/2002 11:04 PM
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You're so far up yourself that you need to stick a toothbrush up your ass to clean your teeth.

...ooooh, I do so love it when you guys wax intellectual.


#60881 04/02/2002 5:41 AM
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In reply to:

Once at a social gathering, Gladstone said to Disraeli,
"I predict, Sir, that you will die either by hanging or
of some vile disease". Disraeli replied, "That all
depends upon whether I embrace your principles or your
mistress".


Sorry Dr. Bill, but I'm pretty sure this was first addressed to the Earl of Sandwich, with the word pox used instead of vile disease.

Bingley



Bingley
#60882 04/02/2002 6:51 PM
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and "on the gallows" rather than "by hanging".

http://wordsmith.org/board/showflat.pl?Cat=&Board=miscellany&Number=52637; Jan. 21

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