#57884
02/23/2002 12:55 AM
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400 |
The Narcissist Lament
Every word, every post, every thread
the sheer magnitude goes to my head
for its plain, you can see
The focus is me
I am the subject of everything said!
It has slowly become very clear to see
that from the letter A to the letter Zee
every study of man
is part of plan
Devised solely to discredit me!
I am perfect, it is plain to see
Perfection its self; embodies me
Like the lamb, i am gentle
Except, i go mental
When i think someone's is picking me!
Of shoes, Imelda Marcos can boast
a collection larger than most
but when it comes a fit
I am the git
Who wears the worst of any post!
I never spoil for a fight, you know
But they occur where ever I show
I am always taken a back
at others manners lack
Because i am always right, it's them that must go!
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#57885
02/23/2002 1:07 AM
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400 |
Max, your a darling, a dear
but you live in a land so queer!
Its so far away
at the beginning of day,
Its made up sheep, cricket, a few men and lots of beer!
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#57886
02/23/2002 1:12 AM
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Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 279
enthusiast
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enthusiast
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 279 |
I read yer last pome through and through
And I fer one wasn't picken on you
I want ta make it quite cleer
That yer a pal of this bear
It's Loxy what's the stone in me shoe.
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#57887
02/23/2002 2:00 AM
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 1,773
Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 1,773 |
Dear MaxQ cannot come to see me
So of Kiwis there will not be three
But CapK and mate
Two Zildians great
Make two Kiwis there will we see
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#57888
02/23/2002 11:44 PM
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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 2,605
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 2,605 |
What is this world coming to?
In her thread titled "limericks, too",
Lots of folks chime in
With handfuls of rhymin'
But Helen has seventy-two!
Her third said a challenge i post
To see, who the most
two pair
and spare
of Rhymes can boast."
'Tis truely a great exhibition,
By a fluidly-tongued rhetorician,
But I'll make a batch up
Attempting to catch up
To make it a true competition.
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#57889
02/24/2002 12:02 AM
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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 2,605
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 2,605 |
I'm particularly floored by your last one, dear.
It seems that your pulling a fast one here.
Our previous riot
Had dropped and gone quiet,
So why did you bring up that past one here?
We've recently been through a thread
Where much castigation was spread.
To repeat would be hazardous,
But you like a Lazarus
Brought it back up when you said:
----->The Narcissist Lament
----->"Every word, every post, every thread"
----->"the sheer magnitude goes to my head"
----->"for its plain, you can see"
----->"The focus is me"
----->"I am the subject of everything said!"
----->"It has slowly become very clear to see"
----->"that from the letter A to the letter Zee"
----->"every study of man"
----->"is part of plan"
----->"Devised solely to discredit me!"
----->"I am perfect, it is plain to see"
----->"Perfection its self; embodis me"
----->"Like the lamb, i am gentle"
----->"Except, i go mental"
----->"When i think someone's is picking me!"
----->"Of shoes, Imelda Marcos can boast"
----->"a collection larger than most"
----->"but when it comes a fit"
----->"I am the git"
----->"Who wears the worst of any post!"
----->"I never spoil for a fight, you know"
----->"But they occur where ever I show"
----->"I am always taken a back"
----->"at others manners lack"
----->"Because i am always right, it's them that must go!"
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#57890
02/24/2002 12:22 AM
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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 2,605
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 2,605 |
Did you have to wake dogs that were nappin'?
Did you have to get just one more slap in?
When you got the notion
To re-stir commotion,
You ought to have thought what would happen.
It's a shame that you never consulted me,
Before dragging back words that insulted me,
Can you leave it alone?
When you picked at that bone,
What did you think the result'd be?
I'm willing to let us forget it.
Just leave it; don't trouble to edit.
But if you again flame dear,
It's not me to blame dear:
If you seek a fight, you will get it.
[get it?]
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#57891
02/24/2002 4:35 AM
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 2,661
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 2,661 |
I hope that the video feed packs
good punch at the Sparteye's. Yet snacks
and the beer won't be sweet
with no chance to meet
or way to shake hands with you, Max.
But at least we can wave as we sway
at the camera we'll hook up that day.
Our tech guys have mission
to give you some vision
of all of us missing your way!
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#57892
02/24/2002 6:23 PM
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Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 11,613
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 11,613 |
Oh, Max, won't you come, pleasepleaseplease?
If you come, it'll be the bee's knees;
Please bring your dear wife
On the trip of her life,
And then we'll have all FOUR Kiwis!
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#57893
02/24/2002 6:34 PM
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Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 3,409
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 3,409 |
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#57894
02/24/2002 6:42 PM
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Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 4,757
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 4,757 |
A previous archbishop of Brizzie
Covered up a scandalous tizzy;
When the news got about
All the papers gave shout:
“You’d better resign – here comes Lizzie!”
[nothere]
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#57895
02/24/2002 7:19 PM
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400 |
A funambulist racked his brain
For a feat that would make his name
So high was his act
as a matter of fact
It could only be seen from a plane!
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#57896
02/24/2002 7:21 PM
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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 11,070 Likes: 2
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 11,070 Likes: 2 |
A very popular thread this, I note, though the Stales Index is "only" 0.16.
W.S. Gilbert (like Isaac Asimov, later) had something to say about limericks, too:
There once was a young man from Beeze
Who was stung in the neck by a wasp.
When asked "Does it hurt?"
He replied "No, it doesn't.
It would have been terrible if it had been a hornet."
Though Asimov was more appreciative of the form, and even publilshed a collection or five of 'em... [?white]
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#57897
02/24/2002 7:27 PM
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400 |
The fever and chills have passed
there may be an end to limericks, at last
but before i go,
i want to know
your contributions have made it a blast!
I thought a list i would head
Limerick Writer's, Well Said!
but it would be sad
not to mention bad
to forget all those who only read!
I hope the my illness has been cause
and given us chance to take pause,
to have some delight
in the words that we write
And now we all deserve some applause!
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#57898
02/24/2002 7:37 PM
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Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 11,613
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 11,613 |
Keiva, I love you, I do;
And you know that my love is so true;
I don't want to blow it
By not daring to show it;
Here's hoping you're happier, too!
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#57899
02/25/2002 6:03 PM
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Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 322
enthusiast
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enthusiast
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 322 |
It's Monday, and time for a fix
Of everyone's new limerix
You delight and amuse me
And sometimes confuse me
AWADers are quite the odd mix!
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#57900
02/25/2002 6:06 PM
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Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 322
enthusiast
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enthusiast
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 322 |
Alrighty - I'll add one more
No chance, though, of evening the score.
Of Troy keeps on writing
And keeps on delighting;
She's a hero of limerick-lore
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#57901
02/25/2002 7:23 PM
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Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 322
enthusiast
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enthusiast
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 322 |
I confess - I start to see red -
Limerick rhythms invading my head!
At work and at play
The beat dogs me all day.
It's a thing up with which I'm getting fed!
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#57902
03/04/2002 2:08 AM
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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 2,605
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 2,605 |
The ladies love humorous Milum;
His versatile wit will beguile 'em.
Pray the lord he's not single in
June, when we're minglin'
Lest his wiles, smiles and guile will defile 'em.
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#57903
03/04/2002 12:17 PM
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Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 872
old hand
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old hand
Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 872 |
Ok, Keiva, wanna play hard ball, huh...Overheard comments made by the prim, proper, pedant, ladies that will attend the Wordapalooza June 2002 “That Milum is the Final Gentleman,
And who would of thought the things that he has thunk,
He is so charming,
And no one he’s harming,
Lying -not laying- there on the floor, dead drunk.” Ha! this is the 99th and last post on this thread. Good-bye. 
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#57904
03/04/2002 1:04 PM
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Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 4,189
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 4,189 |
Please see limericks, too, (redux) for the continuation.
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