The ad campaigne is growing old, the pink bunny, never will fold he's got nothing me energized? we'll see i have limericks and rhyme, to last for all time, there are millions more to be told!
Faldage has tossed out demean a word he has recently seen now its a rhyme in a limerick -this time Awads so slow, where will i go, to find new words to glean?
a post maybe, i , backwards will try anastrophicly stated maybe betsy will be baited limericks to write by and by.
Now that the man from Nantucket is here Now this threads is finaly in fifth gear we'll rev and race to each find first place Words will be quick, inuendo thick, a free for all, is what i fear!
How about that old man from Kent? I don't know just how it went mother would blush and tell Da, hush! and out of the room i would be sent!
I'm sweet and simple and pure a double entendre, i'm sure will give me start, as i take it apart, and will finaly be, an end you'll see and for this madness a cure!
So - it's saucy limericks you're after The kind that induce guilty laughter. I ask, "Is there shame Or any kind of blame In being the naughty-limerick-crafter?"
Of all the things i learned this board The one that most particularlly floored was that men far and wide with sheep, do abide! Or at least they are reputed to have scored!
Our dear Helen of Troy is a writin' some sweet limericks for us to bite in but the rhythms you know on her last lines do show a bit different version, a little perversion: an extra rhymed couple of lines in.
How far does the definition include different lengths of last line and still be considered a limerick?
the secondary stages of madness now start and my sweet cover is coming apart with a coy little grin and a sly little spin some more adult limericks now i impart.
I am know well as woman who flirts a reputation I've earned on my merits i make goo-goo eyes and encourage the guys remember, No pain, no gain, keep at it till it hurts!
I love the idea of being chaste and slow courting, and romance, not haste but kiss me and then kiss me again and your efforts won't go to waste!
Dear Helen has gone now and did it what she does deserve, she will get it with a wink and a flirt tended clean or with dirt Without waste as she promised? I won't bet it!
There once was a limerick bonanza Where some rhymes had more than one stanza Poor Ted wasn't sure If this form was pure But then again he's only a little teddy bear.
My last submission, almost vulgar enough to be a real one.
F anny Hill led a life under shelter I n the cathouse, though, everyone felt her. E ach morning repented - N ightly, naughties she scented. D amned near everyone stopped by and smelt her.
A gorgeous young lady of Troy: Posting limericks her only true joy. She posted away But to her dismay, They didn't attract the right boy
So posting once more it began And Helen, she showed her true hand. Some were heard to mutter, "We're into the gutter." Yet still no sign of her man
In the end she had to go private To me she wrote, "If you desire it, Would you put up a poem And some rhymes if you know 'em?" I did; and now of Troy's fire, lit.
Limeraiku
The AWAD pooh-bah went too far, but got (merde mot) Away with hoo-ha.
Committed no crime But yet I'm slapped. Spirit sapped. Silent passes time.
A woman I once knew did marry The last name of Dick she did carry They lived on Swallow Boulevard And at times it was hard But harder it'd have been-hubby's Gary, not Harry.
There once were two teams of tough maidens the slapshots and plays wouldn't faze them when the ticker had tocked and the final shot blocked the Canucks came home Gold medals blazin' !!!!
Now the men with pressure for their role Take inspiration from the last second goal To rally the troops, and take pride in their roots, Win the Gold net the puck in the five-hole!!!
(hmmm...that was awkward!) Congratulations to Canada and the USA!! Wicked game!
There once was a stranger named Norm His job, to show he could perform He rhymed about pucks And said Congrats to Cannucks I send him this greeting so warm
So welcome Aboard from an Angel And maybe even from Bel We play everyday And have lots to say I'm sure you'll fit in quite well
Whenever the board has got tacky The shout goes out loud for our Jackie She polices the gutter Checks each word we utter And won't let us chew gum or 'bacca.
When ever they feeling quite frisky, Bel, Helen and Connie get risqué With entendres double They get right into trouble Then put all the blame on the whiskey.
Whenever he can't get to sleep, Maverick sits counting sheep At least, he tells us so; I'm not sure if I know If he ain't hiding something more deep!
For poems filled with appeal None are better than Whitman O'Neill. But his poems don't rhyme, So I spend all my time In trying this defect to heal. but wotthehell, archie, toujours gaie!
If the sound of gut-scraping makes you-sick Please keep the fact quiet from Musick He's mourning his old car So we mustn't go so far As to leave him feeling too-sick. - and I'm mourning it, too - I know how it feels to lose a beloved old mechanical friend!!!
To finish, I'll just have to lean On words that rhymne well with Bean Her limerick posting (Next to Helen, the most's bin) Are among the best that we have seen
Whenever my spelling grows lax I take comfort from our good old Max. When our multiple typos Give us both the gripe-ohs We just smile and pat each other's backs.
When you want to know what's to be done, Wise Old Woman is really the one. She replies in a trice With the most sound "Add Vice!" Which at least makes our trouble more fun.
It started just as a lark but the first ignited a spark Will the fire burn out? i haven't a doubt, but not before its has left its mark!
It's Wordwind you really must blame (though, I hated to name her by name!) Her word play and fun My simple brain unstrung Hippopotumusitis and limerickitis are one and the same!
My dear, please don't take this to heart And think i wish you to depart But rather, Please, Sneeze a great sneeze! and another wild, wooly, wonderful word epidemic, Start!
There was a young lad they call Pollock, His tendencies were alcoholic, He charmed all the girls, By admiring their curls, And soon in his room they would frolic!
My desk is awash in white paper, Where poems are meeting their maker, I'm s'posed to be working, My research I'm shirking, My thoughts wander o'er hell's half acre.
I'm bettin our new bud named Norm Is up there a partyin' a storm Guitar's he's a makin' and if I'm not mistaken He's logged a different name here before
It's good to see my ol' bud G-Ted His input here is sorely needed a word from the wize with a spelling dis-guy's though 'iz rhyming scheemz are quite whacked
My spelling be partner from Eire was showing them gamblers his care for their troubles and woes brought by losing to foes but with Goldielocks he's no ted-e-bear
There was a pretty gal from the city Who said "It's such a pity!" As a bimbo I can Land any man, But not if I act smart and witty"
So this smart young lady took part in a plan to catch a man's heart she baited her snare with her long flowing hair and enough make up to look like a tart.
On her hand now, diamonds galore on her ears and wrists, several more her silken dark curls don't cover her pearls And suiters she has by the score!
The commando’s command of a crank In ancient MGs breaks the bank; The spark is still willing But the travelling’s uphilling, So he has to get out for a walk!
So she snared up a hunk, chest heaving, but appearances can be deceiving the hunk turned to junk her life turned to funk and now she's fed up and she's leaving.
But when looks have slipped all down the drain And your love life’s a bit of a pain, Will it be your lament, When your face is all bent, That seduction works better by brain?
Like St Augustine, venerated scholar, I do Pray I get down on my knees and humbly say "Make me pure, make me chaste, but don't do it with haste Let me be wicked for just one more day!"
Smiley faces and frowns, , for some are must for others, these signs signal teasing or lust! a grin or a Wink Got someone to think I'm laughing out loud, i think i will bust!
and if I'm not mistaken He's logged a different name here before
Your welcomes are very kind to hear But alas, never 'fore was I here Now I must rest After the post about breasts Since laughter was so hard I shed tears!
Dear Norm I am glad you are smiling Tis mistaken I was bout your filing your name on this board to be different before then two guitar builders have we for riling
To Michigan, Sparteye's attracting a throng, For a word fest to last all the week long. No Ozzie or Kiwi, there will we see, Only the best, the wordapaloozest, at the flong!
Dear Helen of Troy (she's our girl) for fast limericks that make my head swirl I can't stop with the laughter So I'd post this after, jotting notes, I'd give it a whirl.
I'm not a great writer you see, but enjoy Wordplay & Fun 'specially, I'm sure Anu didn't know how his idea would grow and turn into jocularity.
I did not know that Cap K bugged out. I was saving my pennies for stout or some other fine ale that we'd drink til we're pale. So I'll just forget he's got clout
to give me a rib for my clause which located him there in the Oz. Though my geography sucks like Faldage's hockey pucks I'll forever refer to it with "blahs".
A gallopen trollop called Loxy Made a poor teddy bear's life rather poxy In the Three Bears' home she was squatten And I think she's pure rotten I'm sorry if me attytude shocks ye.
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