our potential for ascending to heights of scatology appears to be infinite

I read you loud and clear: you're saying s--t floats!
Now I understand your odd perspective on gutters--
yours have nice leaves, and get washed by lovely rainwater.
I was thinking of the ones that run along the edges of the
streets, and used to carry much nastier things than that.
They may even have contributed to the cholera outbreaks in Britain in 1832, '47, '53, and '66.