Maxim: Don’t point to a problem unless you’re prepared to suggest a solution.

We have a problem of people being hurt by comments felt as rude. In the spirit of that maxim, may I suggest a credo which, if enough of us adopt and follow it, will go far to help us deal with the hurts that are sure to occur from time to time?
-------------------
1. I don’t claim to be perfect. When I err and am rude, I’ll sincerely apologize.

2. I don’t expect others to perfect. When I get an apology like that, I’ll accept it graciously.

3. When someone else is hurt by rudeness without apology, it is my responsibility, to the board, to post to assuage him or her. I'll do that (unless others have already done it and I would be merely cumulative). I won't leave them feeling alone and abandoned.

4.. Rudeness includes abusive language, personal attacks or gratuitous stepping on someone else’s sensibilities.

Don't let it fester: skip any excuses; skip long analysis that "something else was really meant". Just apologize, and go on. And don’t play the game of "pushing the envelope" to see just how much "borderline rudeness" you can get away with.