In a post recently, someone said they wanted to get in "the last word" as the thread became knotted with rejoinders. We all know people (contrary to popular belief, not only men) who absolutely MUST have "the last word" on every subject. It's a compulsion. There must be a word to describe these people. Does anyone know what it is? We are indebted to them here on AWADtalk because they are the life support system for many otherwise terminal threads. In the event that no-one can find a word which describes a person having a compulsive need to register "the last word" on every subject, I am proposing the word "Omegatist".
Dear Plutarch: Indeed there is a need for the word. We all have met more than one guy to whom it would apply, the kind of guy who would die of frustration on a visit to Echo Canyon. Your " omegatist" has "egotist" in it, which I like. The only problem is that the targets don't know "omega" is last letter in Greek alphabet. Just to show I tried, I thought of "ultimatist" but isn't as good as yours.
While looking in Internet for ideas, I ran across this put-down:
Sconser A person who looks around when talking to you, to see if there's anyone more interesting about. Yes, wwh. I have been "sconsed" a few times myself ... usually when I am doing my own "sconsing". Would you call this a "double sconse"? Have you noticed that "sconsors" are usually too busy "sconsing" to know that they are being being "sconsed"? BTW if a "target" doesn't know he's been targeted, at least initially, that's not such a bad thing. The best terms of derision are like those "bunker busters" they are using in Afghanistan. They squirrel their way in before they explode.
Speaking of solecisms, what do you call the practice of picking imaginary lint off the shoulder of a vicitim's suit in feigned concern for his appearance?
Dear Wordminstrel: I had a teacher who used to pick lint off us boys. So I took a spool of thread, passed end through eye of needle, passed needle through inside of breast pocket up to shoulder of my coat with the spool in breast pocket. Just as I knew she would, she picked up thread and pulled out a yard of thread. She nearly fainted, expecting to see my suit coal fall apart.
I had a teacher who used to pick lint off us boys. So I took a spool of thread ..... Just as I knew she would, she picked up thread and pulled out a yard of thread. She nearly fainted, expecting to see my suit coal fall apart. Get outta here! You did that! Genius. Pure Genius, wwh. Who can top this school boy prank? Anyone want to try? BTW, you've been known to needle some of those same threads here in AWADtalk .
From a circa-1970's issue of Reader's Digest, Quotable Quotes (I remember this because my mom had it taped to the inside of the pantry door for a decade or two):
If you really want the last word in an argument, try saying "I guess you're right"
and guess what... it works! =)
and in reckless deviation from the subject at hand, i might as well share the quote which she had taped below that one, only because i think it's so wise (and could potentionally be put to use here in AWADtalk, in these volatile times):
"Never answer an angry word with an angry word... It's the second one that makes the quarrel"
In the eighth grade, I had an English teacher(she was also my Home Ec teacher) who was so old and burnt out and boring, I would conceal a book in my lap and read for the full hour. One day, thinking to expose me for reading in class, she asked the question first and then called on me by name. Well, something intuitively alerted me and I was listening with 1 1/2 ears when she asked the question. I merely looked up from my book, answered the question correctly, and resumed reading. She never tried a stunt like that again and I was allowed to read at will. I also aced the class.
Lucky you! i tried the same in geometry.. i got called on to provide the area of a regular polygon.. and i looked up from i remember this well, i had just gotten permission that very day to read it, and was hell bent on reading non-stopValley of the Dolls, and had the answer in seconds.
the teacher was red faced with anger. he thought he was going to catch me out.. I ended up with a 90 on the regents (hot shot NY State-wide test) but he gave me a 75 as final grade.
in the annals of AWADtalk, I have been patsy more often than perpetrator. I find that hard to believe, wwh. P.S. What do we call these lint pickers anyway? Some, like your teacher, collect lint balls, I suspect. But most pick away at imaginary lint in some sort of grooming ritual calculated to make the groomee more submissive.
Dear moss: That teacher who picked lint always made it clear that it was a bit of affection, that she liked us, and I am now ashamed of having played the joke on her. I bitterly regret that I never found the occasion, nor made the necessary effort to thank the many teachers to whom I owed so much.
But most pick away at imaginary lint in some sort of grooming ritual calculated to make the groomee more submissive.
Oh, i don't know, it could be done as an opening gambit. a way of initiating touch with some one you like.. oh, excuse me, Mr. X, you have some lint, let me remove it...
I bitterly regret that I never found the occasion, nor made the necessary effort to thank the many teachers to whom I owed so much. You're making up for it, wwm. You are an example for others to follow. Myself included.
I have been "sconsed" a few times myself ... usually when I am doing my own "sconsing". Would you call this a "double sconse"? Order me a double scotch.
Woah! Bad, naughty Guy Noble, lighting our sconser-shaped beacon but not telling the audience where it comes from.
'Sconser' is this sense was created by Douglas Adams and John Lloyd for their fount of new words, The Meaning of Liff. Before that it had been wasting its time being a British place-name.
The website quoting it is of ABC-FM (or ABC Classic FM as they now call it), Australia's equivalent of BBC Radio 3. The morning announcer, Guy Noble, is a pleasant and humorous chap (not unlike Humphrey Carpenter in a way, if you know him), who each morning reads out a peculiar word sent in by listeners. On Friday he combines them in a sentence.
The only problem is that the targets don't know "omega" is last letter in Greek alphabet. I consulted a dictionary for all the meanings of "Omega", wwh. The primary meaning is the one you have indicated. But another meaning is: "the last of a series, the end". (Ref. Random House Webster's Unabridged, 2001). The last post on a thread is certainly "the last of a series", wwh. If MY post becomes the LAST post on this subject ("Omegatist"), will I then become the author of my own rebuke? A fitting end, perhaps.
Now see what you've done, Wordminstrel! No-one was interested in having "the last word" until you showed up and now everyone's trying to get in on the act. Are you happy now?
There, I knew it! You're not a genuine omegatist, Wordminstrel. You're more interested in depriving me of the last word than having the last word for yourself. This is just a control issue for you, Wordminstrel. That makes you an omegatrix, or maybe an omegarchist, but you are certainly NOT an omegatrist.
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I actually® have a better one, but not for all the *virgin ears around here...
