From my inbox today:

GUIDELINES FOR ENLIGHTENMENT

1. Be a Fundamentalist--make sure the Fun always comes before the Mental.
Realize that life is a situation comedy that will never be canceled. A laugh
track has been provided, and the reason why we are put in the material world
is to get more material. Have a good laughsitive twice a day, and that will
ensure regularhilarity.

2. Remember that each of us has been given a special gift, just for
entering - so you are already a winner!

3. The most powerful tool on the planet today is Tell-A-Vision. That is
where I tell a vision to you, and you tell a vision to me. That way, if we
don't like the programming we're getting, we can simply change the channel.

4. Life is like photography. You use the negative to develop.

5. It is true. As we go through life thinking heavy thoughts, thought
particles tend to get caught between the ears, causing a condition called
truth decay. So be sure to use mental floss twice a day. And when you're
tempted to practice tantrum yoga, remember what we teach in our Absurdiveness Training class: *Don't get even, get odd.*

6. If we want world peace, we must let go of our attachments and truly live
like nomads. That's where I no mad at you, you no mad at me. That way,
there'll surely be nomadness on the planet. And peace begins with each of
us. A little peace here, a little peace there, pretty soon all the peaces
will fit together to make one big peace everywhere.

7. I know great earth changes have been predicted for the future, so if
you're looking to avoid earthquakes, my advice is simple. When you find a
fault, just don't dwell on it.

8. There's no need to change the world. All we have to do is toilet train
the world, and we'll never have to change it again.

9. If you're looking to find the key to the Universe, I have some bad news
and some good news. The bad news is: there is no key to the Universe. The
good news is: it has been left unlocked.


Bingley

Bingley