only peripherally related, but these somehow reminded me of an email that circulated a couple of years ago, which included (among others) the following Things Not To Say To a Policeman When You've Been Pulled Over:
1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.
2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
3. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a cop.
4. I almost decided to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.
5. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
6. Do *you* know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
7. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around-that's how far ahead of me they are.
8. Well, when I reached down to pick up my bag of crack, my gun fell off my lap and got lodged between the brake pedal and the gas pedal, forcing me to speed out of control.
