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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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Bingley
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The fun with this sort of joke is to choose a profession or whatever and challenge someone to devise a new ( or appropriately recycled) joke.
Here's one I devised (the only one I can recall at present - the rest are at home):
How many double-glazing salesmen does it take to change a lightbulb?
Well, with the manager's special offer, the easy-pay rebate, and the introductory discount, I'm sure you'll be pleasantly surprised at the final figure.
Taking my life in my hands, as for all I know there may turn out to be as many double-glazing professionals on this board as there are Daves; double-glazing selling is a standard joke in UK for the persistent telephone calls, and the peculiar pricing strategies. What professions fill this role in your country?
Rod
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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double-glazing selling is a standard joke in UK for the persistent telephone calls, and the peculiar pricing strategies. What professions fill this role in your country?
Telemarketers are what we call them in US ... marketing a product by telephone calls.
Arrrgh! And they always used to call at dinnertime ... many states have passed laws forbidding the calls betweeen 6 and 8 p.m.
Evidently enough politicians were annoyed by the calls to take action!
The worst for me are the telemarketers trying to sell me an alternate telephone service! I tell them I have stock in AT&T and will stay with MaBell ... (actually it's just two shares but they don't know that!)
Next come the calls selling Vinyl house siding ... I say thanks but the area I live in has a covenant against using siding! That stops 'em in their tracks. (That it happens to be true is a bonus!)
In US you can tell telemarketers to take your name off the call list and also not to share with others ... they have to stop for a year! (or so I understand ... Sparteye or other lawyers aBoard have more info?)
Anyone care to share their "go away" answers to telemarketing calls?
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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merkins
blond pubic wigs
Need I remind you Dr. Bill, that English, like most (if not all) natural languages, is context sensitive?
Merkin and Proud of it on this Most Merkin of all Holidays!!!
DO NOT BE DISSUADED BY THE GIGGLES OF ENGLISH SCHOOL BOYS!!!
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Anyone care to share their "go away" answers to telemarketing calls?
In UK we have the Mailing Preference Service on which you can add your name and address and similar services for telephone and e-mail. Cold callers are supposed to check against the list, but can call if you forgot to check the box in the Arabic small print. It lasts for ever I believe, but I am not sure what the penalties are for breaking the rules.
In UK, we also call them telemarketeers (when feeling polite) but the only ones I seem to get by phone are double glazing. They seem to have stopped because I did add our number to the list. They also got fed up with me saying we were in a conservation zone (also true).
I find "No thanks" and putting the phone down works. "Don't call me, I'll call you", "Do you want to waste both our valuable time and have me say no at the end, or do you want to ring some more likely shot now?", "What a shame, I had them done last week", or my favourite "I'll hand you to the wife, she handles things like that!". She is so mad at me she takes it out on them.
Rod
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Joined: Feb 2001
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enthusiast
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enthusiast
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many states have passed laws forbidding the calls betweeen 6 and 8 p.m.
In New York, we have a law that stops the companies from calling people who apply by a certain date each year.
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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Dear Faldage: the rappers and such scum who enjoy perverting things slyly, were probably responsible for inveigling unaware Americans into call themselves an obscenity. There are gutter musical groups and nightclubs so named. Back in Buzzard's Bay there was a nightclub called the Scatophagus Room. The Greek owner enjoyed calling his patrons in Greek what he would not dare call them in English. If you want to call yourself a merkin, go ahead. But I do not care to join you.
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Joined: Sep 2000
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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DO NOT BE DISSUADED BY THE GIGGLES OF ENGLISH SCHOOL BOYS!!!Quite right. It is every Merkin's privilege to make a hairy prat of themselves at least once a year  Happy Fourth, guys.
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Joined: Dec 2000
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old hand
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old hand
Joined: Dec 2000
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>Anyone care to share their "go away" answers to telemarketing calls?
I always liked the 'phone line is cracking up' ploy, or alternatively (if on a mobile phone) just walking down to the cellar.
Also, getting over friendly and asking them all the questions is great fun if you have a few spare minutes.
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Carpal Tunnel
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OP
Carpal Tunnel
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What professions fill this role in your country?In this part of the US, at least, it'd be vinyl siding.
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