#29159
05/15/2001 5:55 AM
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Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 3,065
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 3,065 |
The scene: a meeting last night attended by yours truly
Dramatis personae:
Andrew, the chair, an Australian
Jill, a US'n from Texas but has moved around a lot
Dialogue:
Andrew: So, who was at the committee meeting? Jill, George, Shelly, Peggy, anyone else?
Jill: May
Andrew: Jill, anyone else?
Jill: May
Andrew: Yes, Jill, anyone else?
Bingley
Bingley
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#29160
05/15/2001 8:15 AM
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Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 3,409
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 3,409 |
Beautiful!  It reminds me of taking a friend to visit an old lady from Belfast who spent much our visit desceribing the arthritis in her spine. Afterwards, my friend wanted to knoww why on earth the old lady wouldn't stop talking about Spain.
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#29161
05/15/2001 9:40 AM
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 393
enthusiast
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enthusiast
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 393 |
Scene. A drycleaner.
Date. When I was in a hotel without access to washing.
Me: How much does it cost to wash a shirt?
She: It depends.
Me: It depends on what?
She: It depends.
Me: What does it dep... oh, eighty pence.
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#29162
05/15/2001 7:33 PM
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Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 3,409
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 3,409 |
Scene. A drycleaner.
Date. When I was in a hotel without access to washing.
Me: How much does it cost to wash a shirt?
She: It depends.
Me: It depends on what?
She: It depends.
Me: What does it dep... oh, eighty pence.
Nicholas, where was that exchange? The Belfast lady I mentioned earlier would have sounded just the same. She told me when I first her that her husband was "idiot". The absence of an article puzzled me, until I realised that she was telling me his age, eighty-eight.
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#29163
05/16/2001 12:29 PM
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 393
enthusiast
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enthusiast
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 393 |
Scene: London.
She was Indian.
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#29164
05/17/2001 8:39 AM
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Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 3,146
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 3,146 |
Scene: London.
She was Indian.Was this stolen from "My Beautiful Laundrette"? 
The idiot also known as Capfka ...
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#29165
05/17/2001 12:13 PM
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Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 6,511
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 6,511 |
Bingley, I read it several times. I even read it aloud. Perhaps I should've asked you in private, but there could be another poor lost soul out there who also didn't get it. Could you please explain? 
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#29166
05/17/2001 1:32 PM
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 1,055
old hand
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old hand
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 1,055 |
Anna, if I may , May is the name of another lady besides Jill, but Andrew understood May to mean 'me', that's why he responded 'Anyone else?'.
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#29167
05/17/2001 1:46 PM
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400 |
I understand you problem Anna-- I "explained" Hempstead--because my parents occationaly "slipped" into the weird UK (type) pronounciations (ham stid)... as a child I had an Aunt MARY-- as an adult I learned her name was Marie--my mother said the name MAR (as in to "mar" a finish-- with the A almost as flat as a Boston A (I pahrked my cahr...) ee-- not the almost "mu REE" sound that is more common in US.(with the first vowel a schwa -- or a blur between an A and U sound...)-- so i, and siblings "mis heard it"-- but so did my aunt-- and she didn't correct us!
Maurice-- come out of my mothers mouth as "Morris", Rollie (short for Roland) as Raleigh--(Ra lee)-- and even with that -- it took me a few seconds to get "it depends" into "eighty pence" .
I think in hundred more years-- we will be like the Chinese-- words will look the same in US/UK/A-NZ "English"-- and we will be able to read each other text-- but the spoken language will be "foreign".
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#29168
05/17/2001 1:53 PM
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Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 6,511
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 6,511 |
Ah. Thanks, BY!  Now it all comes clear.  cheers, Eliza Doolittle
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#29169
05/17/2001 2:48 PM
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Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 2,204
Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 2,204 |
And this year's tree felling competition was won by t'ree fellers from Connemara
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#29170
05/17/2001 6:35 PM
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400 |
and vocabulary--In the valise thread-- you said you were too mean to by food and beer on a train-- I take it you find the prices too dear?
In US mean could be used in a mathematical sense--(mid point-- not "average of a set of values"-- but the midpoint of a set of values (mean salaries in NYC are 40% higher than national average*) or else:
To have in mind, (what do you mean by that remark?) and
Harsh or negative (Mean streets, or mean task master)
but almost never in the sense of frugal--
like wise, expensive things are never dear-- (sweet hearts are dear-- and some times expensive, too)
*a statement i recently read-- proving Twain's axiom-- "There are 3 kinds of lies-- lies, damn lies and statistics."
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#29171
05/18/2001 8:39 AM
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 1,055
old hand
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old hand
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 1,055 |
The 'mean' you wrote of Helen, is short for 'mean with money' as I see it (i.e. miserly, tight mingy), but if someone says 'He's a mean old man!' without much other information, most would probably think it implies two meanings in one, stingy (lack of means) and hateful.
Conversation:
Girl: What's that old man doing?
Boy: That mean man means to steal that mean man's mean wallet content daily, as a means to live. Know wot I mean luv?
Girl: By all means.
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#29172
05/23/2001 2:46 PM
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Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 2,204
Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 2,204 |
were too mean to by food and beer on a train--
------- (various US meanings of mean) but almost never in the sense of frugal--No, not frugal, but as b-y rightly says - miserly. If I had meant "frugal" I would probably have used, "careful," "shrewd" or the good old Scots phrase, "canny." In the UK, we use all of the other meanings of "mean" as well, though. *a statement i recently read-- proving Twain's axiom-- "There are 3 kinds of lies-- lies, damn lies and statistics."Surely this famous remark is attributed to Benjamin Disraeli, English Prime Minister at end of C19, not the celebrated Mr Clements?
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#29173
05/23/2001 3:35 PM
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 13,803
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 13,803 |
Rhuby comments, about the attribution of the lies, damned lies and statistics quote: Surely this famous remark is attributed to Benjamin Disraeli, English Prime Minister at end of C19, not the celebrated Mr Clements?From the Mark Twain quote finder: http://www.boondocksnet.com/twainwww/quotefinder.htmlThere are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics. --Mark Twain attributed this to Disraeli
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#29174
05/23/2001 4:24 PM
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400 |
Thanks Faldage-- I did remember hearing Twains name with the quote... Its is such a wonderful one... I love how statistics are bandied about.. and mangled.. and how they can be used intentionaly to confuse-- or even lie..
and Rhu-- i was being kind-- I used frugal as syn. with mean-- rather than the harsher word --cheap which is what i was thinking-- rather than miserly-- to cheap pay what the railroad charge-- as in a cheapstake-- I frequently define my self as cheap, (not in the sense inexpensive) but with a sense of miserly-- a word i rarely use--
Is that me? or general in US? (any one care to comment?
Cheap=tight with money-- i am too cheap to buy bottled water-- I just refill water bottles with water from the tap.
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#29175
05/23/2001 5:03 PM
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 1,156
old hand
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old hand
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 1,156 |
cheapstake
Spelling mistake, or is this the word you meant? I use cheapskate.
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#29176
05/23/2001 5:06 PM
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400 |
Yes-- a misspelling-- I was actually required to do some work (Heavens!) when the boss call, the forum is forgotten..
crossing thread-- I have AWAD forward any responce to my post to my email account-- so i am always moving in and out of Awad and work....
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#29177
05/24/2001 7:14 AM
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Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 2,204
Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 2,204 |
I just refill water bottles with water from the tap.Oooh!! I do envy you (or, possibly, I'm jealous of you ) The tap water round here is so vile that even I can't bring myself to do that - it tastes as though it has dripped from Lucifer's boots. The best I can manage is to buy the 5 litre bottles of water and refill my small bottle from that. I saves quite a lot of cash, that way, even allowing for my shaking hand causing spillage.
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#29178
06/28/2001 11:27 AM
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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 609
addict
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addict
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 609 |
The pilot had passed all the exams to become an officer in the Royal Air Force and was being congratulated by his commanding officer. "Now all you need to know is the secret greeting between officers. It's quite easy to remember. The fisrt part is.. oh that thin transparent stuff planes fly through" "Air?" "That's right. And the second is the fuzzy stuff that grows out of your head" "Hair?" "Just so. And the third is the cave that bears live in" "Lair?" "Exactly. Now just string them together" "Air Hair Lair" "Perfect".  Rod
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#29179
06/28/2001 12:03 PM
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400 |
AirHairLair
I would use the same ai sound in all three words-- So, how else would it be said? (and if it is all ai sounds what the key to understanding?
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#29180
06/28/2001 12:14 PM
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 13,803
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 13,803 |
AirHairLair
So, how else would it be said?
The joke falls thuddily on this fallow USn ear, too.
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#29181
06/28/2001 12:32 PM
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Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 4,757
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 4,757 |
It's taking the piss out of upper-class-twit-of-the-year accents' mangled vowels: "Eeow, hair-leooooh" or o, hello
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#29182
06/28/2001 1:07 PM
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 13,803
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 13,803 |
upper-class-twit-of-the-year accents
Reminds me of the old song as sung by the stuffy upper class Brit:
You say potahto and I say potahto
You say tomahto and I say tomahto
Potahto, potahto,
Tomahto, tomahto,
Let's call the whole thing off.
You know, I just don't see what their problem is???
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#29183
06/28/2001 5:20 PM
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 87
journeyman
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journeyman
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 87 |
cheapstake
Spelling mistake, or is this the word you meant? I use cheapskate.That was a sleudian frip.
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#29184
07/02/2001 5:57 PM
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Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 6,511
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 6,511 |
It's taking the piss out of upper-class-twit-of-the-year accents' mangled vowels: "Eeow, hair-leooooh" or o, hello
Thankee kindly, mav. I pernounced it all kindsa ways upside to a goat and couldn't figger it out. When you splained, I liked to died laughin. wow, that is how Hyacinth Bucket *tries to speak, no?
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#29185
07/03/2001 5:00 AM
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Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 3,146
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 3,146 |
I picked up the upper-class connotation straight away of course. But here's something arising from my current peripatetic peregrination around the US: I've found that if I take the piss out of the American accent and drawl with the worst of 'em, then it has two effects: (a) the Americans can understand me without circular conversations revolving around accent, and (b) they stop asking me where I'm from. I object to the second part, because if you're taking the piss, you should at least get some satisfaction from your target's reaction. So I guess I'm not a successful piss-taker when it comes to accents gawddam it, y'all!
The idiot also known as Capfka ...
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#29186
07/03/2001 12:03 PM
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Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 2,379
Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 2,379 |
<<So I guess I'm not a successful piss-taker when it comes to accents gawddam it, y'all! >>
Dear Cap:
A tip from the boards: when taking a piss, take it over the top. ;)
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#29187
07/03/2001 12:24 PM
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 1,055
old hand
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old hand
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 1,055 |
> A tip from the boards: when taking a piss, take it over the top. ;)
Or alternatively, try applying an accent that isn't yours or theirs and see if they swallow it. This can provide hours of fun. Tell stories about the wildlife in South Africa or the vineyards of France using the necessary inflection.
Sometimes the satisfaction involved in pulling someone's leg doesn't involve the other understanding the hoax, but rather the look of bewilderment on the other's face :-)
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