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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 2,661
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 2,661 |
That underappreciated gem of American culture, The Simpsons......besides most over 50yr olds everyone I know and/or have ever talked to about the Simpsons think that they are "on the nose" or "all that" or "their favorite" or "cowabunga dude"  . I had a neighborhood child come to me and ask if I could help him put a horn on his bike (like we need more sound in our hood). I agreed, and opened up the package to see what kind of tools I would require, and lo and behold, a nicely drafted picture of the fully assembled horn attached to the handlebars just off the neck - top view only - no view of the lower brackets - and the following words printed on the bottom: How to fix the horn.
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 1,773
Pooh-Bah
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OP
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 1,773 |
This weekend, I discovered a treasure-trove of Japanese English: http://www.engrish.com/The flowers are blooming pretty The garden has homey feel about it Shall we refresh with open air?
Hug & Kiss Taste
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Oh.... my gosh....  the clothing section ( http://www.engrish.com/apparel.html) is over the top... some funny stuff there, sparteye; thanks for the link!!
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 1,773
Pooh-Bah
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OP
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 1,773 |
On an exhibit label in a Tanzanian museum:
The Soda Bottle (ancient)
The soda bottle which in use up to 1959. This bottle contain a marble and rubbering which jointly (wished) as a stopper for the gas.
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 275
enthusiast
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enthusiast
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 275 |
I do not have the instructions in front of me but I cannot forget it...
This is for cooking instant noodles.
Boil water and insert noodles..
chronist
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 771
old hand
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old hand
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 771 |
Got a story about a friend of a friend... when in Prague, he visited a zoo. Around the cages, there were warning signs admonishing visitors "These animals do not smoothen"
Someone clearly had trouble translating the concept "Do not pet the animals".
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 328
enthusiast
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enthusiast
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 328 |
From the paper sleeve holding a pair of chopsticks: Welcome to Chinese Restaurant. Please try your Nice Chinese Food With Chopsticks the traditional and typical of Chinese glonous history and cultual.I especially liked the "glonous" typo. 
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Joined: May 2001
Posts: 28
newbie
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newbie
Joined: May 2001
Posts: 28 |
One of the salesmen at our company managed this one the other day. He was in an all-fired hurry to get his latest (long-winded, self-aggrandizing, and tiresome) sales mailing piece printed, and in the process slapped another N on the end of his darn, instantly transmogrifying it to the potentially problematic damn. I was asked my opinion on how best to remedy this...I suggested correction fluid, though I was no more specific than that, as my recommendations may have been taken in the spirit they were made. 
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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 609
addict
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addict
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 609 |
From the instructions for Tiger Balm picked up in Singapore. (and confirming my reputation for getting to the bottom of things) "Indications: Effective in relieving headaches, stuffy nose, insect bites, itchiness, muscular ache and pains, sprains and flatulence. Directions: Apply Tiger Balm gently on the affected areas."
Rod
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Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 3,146
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 3,146 |
I think I may have already posted this in another thread (self-YARTing!). But both I and a friend of mine have dealt with Chinese/Japanese booking clerks on airlines who have handed us our tickets, smiled nicely, and adjured us to have "a nice fright".
The idiot also known as Capfka ...
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