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Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,255 Likes: 7
Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,255 Likes: 7 |
Lord Louis Mountbatten
Tended to flatten
Those of lesser authority
With his air of superiority.
Archbishop Cosmo Lang
Did not make much of a bang
But had to face a tricky situation
At the time of the Abdication.
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Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,255 Likes: 7
Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,255 Likes: 7 |
The Two Ronnies, Corbett and Barker,
Disliked comedians whose humour was darker.
Their TV series were good clean fun,
In which Barker used words to garble and pun.
Eric Morecambe and Ernie Wise
Were once Britain's top two comedy guys.
Their Christmas shows on the BBC
Topped the ratings in 1970s TV.
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Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,255 Likes: 7
Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,255 Likes: 7 |
When Satan fell from grace
Into the other place,
He taunted God about Creation's state,
But God eschewed theological debate.
Mother Teresa?
Not all writers praise her.
Some say her principal goal
Was not curing the body, but saving the soul.
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Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,255 Likes: 7
Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,255 Likes: 7 |
John Napier
Had a mind like a rapier.
He simplified the operation
Of exponentiation.
The works of Enid Blyton
Nowadays tend to frighten
Most child psychologists
And politically correct apologists.
David Bowie
Was exceptionally showy.
Had he been unobtrusive,
His appeal would have been more exclusive.
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Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,255 Likes: 7
Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,255 Likes: 7 |
Ancient Sparta
Had no Magna Carta.
In a state geared to military fights,
There was no place for human rights.
The Romans had few checks
On extramarital sex.
But once the Christian era had begun,
It was forbidden to have such fun.
Boys at Eton
Were regularly beaten
By swaggering prefects
For the most trivial defects.
Political campaigns
Assume we have no brains.
Their targeting is clinical,
And their appeal to prejudice is cynical.
Both Presidential frontrunners are mad,
And one is also bad.
America's famed democracy
Is now a tribal gerontocracy.
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Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 9,933 Likes: 3
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 9,933 Likes: 3 |
Both Presidential frontrunners are mad, And one is also bad. America's famed democracy Is now a tribal gerontocracy. 
----please, draw me a sheep----
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Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,255 Likes: 7
Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,255 Likes: 7 |
Marilyn Monroe
Always stole the show.
She was both funny and glamorous,
Making men amused and amorous.
Santa Claus
Does not obey Nature's laws,
But children do not find this odd
As the same applies to Jesus and God.
General Patton
Threatened to flatten
Any cowards or shirkers.
He wanted heroes and hard workers.
Field Marshal Rommel
Had an old Prussian Trommel
Which he would superstitiously beat
In order to prevent defeat.
Ho Chi Minh
Said the Viet Cong would win
Their war of attrition
If the US eschewed nuclear fission.
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Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,255 Likes: 7
Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,255 Likes: 7 |
Clerihews on Greek philosophy
The ancient Stoics
Said "There's no need for heroics.
Clear thinking and self-control
Will best sustain your body and soul".
If Aristotle
Had seen a Klein bottle,
He might have linked its strange topology
To something sublime in theology.
Parmenides said
That change is an illusion inside our head.
When pressed to explain the illusion,
He showed considerable confusion.
The Pre-Socratics taught
That the earth was flat, as they truly thought.
But the later Greek sages
Worked out the truth in a few simple stages.
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Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,255 Likes: 7
Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,255 Likes: 7 |
Israel's prime minister,
Whom his opponents think sinister,
Was told by Biden: "Here's some more cash,
But please don't do anything rash".
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Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,255 Likes: 7
Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,255 Likes: 7 |
Jason Beer KC
Deserves a hefty fee
For grilling witnesses in the Post Office scandal
With the vast paperwork which he can effortlessly handle.
Sir Wyn Williams, the inquiry's Chair,
Controls proceedings with wisdom and care,
With an occasional intervention
When a witness's answer defies comprehension.
Post Office staff (whom I shall not name)
Mostly reply, with no hint of shame,
"I'm sorry, I cannot recall –
It's so long ago, I've forgotten it all".
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