|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
SERIAL – SET
When Britain was proudly imperial,
As I saw in a dramatized serial,
They set Empire Day
In the fourth week of May
And sang jingoistic material.
SHUFFLE – SHUT
Last edited by A C Bowden; 08/01/2020 12:59 AM.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 11,066 Likes: 2
Carpal Tunnel
|
|
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 11,066 Likes: 2 |
It's all gotten lost in the shuffle
From the epi-pan-demic kerfluffle
But as Bonn is shut down
By that virus-with-crown
We are forced to eat French-fried Kartoffel.
HOPPER - HOUSE
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 11,066 Likes: 2
Carpal Tunnel
|
|
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 11,066 Likes: 2 |
There's a registered voter in Leeds
Whose heart for (you-fill-it-in) bleeds
His no-compromise view
Leaves him nothing to do
Unless part of the country secedes
Moving right along...
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 11,066 Likes: 2
Carpal Tunnel
|
|
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 11,066 Likes: 2 |
HOPPER - HOUSE
Reminiscences from years past -
Planetarium roof was all copper
which grew a patina on topper
And the boiler for steam
Was a little boy's dream
Being fueled by coal from a hopper
GRAIN - GREAT
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
Great statesmen possess the capacity
For subtle strategic mendacity.
But, as with good spies,
Their tactical lies
May have a small grain of veracity.
SECOND – SEIZE
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 11,066 Likes: 2
Carpal Tunnel
|
|
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 11,066 Likes: 2 |
Task: write a limerick involving Leeds, Scotland
I have to get soil for my seeds.
It's one of my very few needs.
And I really don't care
For a boat on the Aire,*
But I'm told that all loam's rowed to Leeds.
*the River Aire is the waterway through Leeds
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
"I'm looking for Leeds", said a gent;
I wasn't sure which one he meant.
"Not Yorkshire!" he said
With a look of sheer dread,
"The one with the castle – in Kent".
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
SECOND – SEIZE
A number of scholars have reckoned
That England's King Richard the Second
Did not seize the hour
To safeguard his power
When Bolingbroke's destiny beckoned.
AREA – ARMADILLO
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
One zoo kept an area free
Of bushes, so people could see
A small armadillo
Emerge from a willow
And eat its quotidian tea.
OBTRUSIVE – OCCASION
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
Trump's presence is very obtrusive;
I wish he were much more reclusive.
His thorough pervasion
Of every occasion
Makes many opponents abusive.
LANDED – LEADING
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
LANDED – LEADING
The Accident Bureau reported
That a wing's leading edge had distorted;
A hole had expanded
Before the plane landed,
And one of the circuits had shorted.
DESOLATE – DESTINED
Last edited by A C Bowden; 10/18/2020 3:01 AM.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
Like most of the bodies in space,
The Moon is a desolate place.
But things will get worse –
The whole universe
Is destined to fade without trace.
RICHNESS – RIGHTFULLY
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
The richness of Shakespeare's expression
Brings joy to the acting profession.
He's rightfully viewed
As the master of mood,
From love to despair or aggression.
OPERATE – OPPOSED
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
True democrats operate thus —
They beg people: "Please vote for us!"
But if we're opposed,
Their tenure is closed,
And they normally leave without fuss.
KEPT – KETCH
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
When steering a ketch in a gale,
You need firm control of each sail.
If the ropes are kept tight
As the wind starts to bite,
No vital components should fail.
DEXTEROUS – DIABOLICAL
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
Franz Liszt's diabolical skill
Gave ardent young ladies a thrill.
His dexterous motion
Raised cries of devotion
Through every scale passage and trill.
HAMMOCK – HANDSOME
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
As she swung in a hammock at sea,
The damsel expressed her ennui:
"A handsome young lover
Might help me recover,
But drowning would set my soul free".
NOTABLE – NOVICE
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
It was really a notable feat
When a novice cook managed to beat
The professional guys
For the national prize.
Prince Charles praised the girl in a tweet.
RESIDUAL – RESOURCES
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
Some jockeys use all their resources
To ride around dangerous courses,
But can't clear their head
Of residual dread
From all the past falls from their horses.
DINGY – DIOCESAN
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
If a bishop of yore were to shirk
His vital diocesan work,
He'd be solemnly whipped
In a dingy old crypt
Where ravenous rodents would lurk.
SIMULTANEOUS – SINCERE
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
SIMULTANEOUS – SINCERE
Though many a chess master aims
To win simultaneous games,
The ones who profess
To have total success
May not be sincere in their claims.
INCEPTION – INCULCATE
Last edited by A C Bowden; 05/01/2021 4:03 AM.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
Since last year's inception of lockdown,
The bug has survived every knockdown.
Some people can't cope,
So, to inculcate hope,
Let's chant: "One more year! Count the clock down!"
KIMONO – KIPPERS
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
She wears a kimono and slippers,
And only buys lettuce and kippers.
She's ever so jolly,
And uses her trolley
To carry two boisterous nippers.
AGE – ALIEN
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
When George Bernard Shaw wrote Pygmalion,
Most people considered it alien
To swear on the stage
In that decorous age,
Unless, of course, they were Australian.
GRANTED – GRAPPLE
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
I grapple with partisan views
When reading political news.
I take it for granted
That facts have been slanted,
But search for reliable clues.
LENS – LEVER
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
I conceived in a dream, while in bed,
A machine for invoking the dead.
With a lens and a lever,
I tuned a receiver
To see them and hear what they said.
HISTORICAL – HOCKEY
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
Historical studies have shown
That some form of hockey was known
To Iron Age tribes.
One author describes
Dried mud balls, and sticks made of bone.
MIXTURE – MODESTLY
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
With a mixture of courage and skill,
The skier careered down the hill.
Then, modestly grinning,
He said "It's not winning
That drives me – it's purely the thrill".
POLISHED – POLYHEDRON
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
A brass polyhedron which stood
On a plinth made of hickory wood
In a Spanish town square
Was polished with care.
It lacked any use, but looked good.
FALLACY – FAMILIAL
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
Incessant familial strife
Is a sad fact of many kids' life.
One fallacy claims
That computer-based games
Can calm them when conflict is rife.
CUSHION – CUTTER
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
CUSHION – CUTTER
A cushion firm purchased a cutter
Which sliced through tough fabrics like butter.
Alas, it broke down –
On my last trip to town,
I saw the machine in a gutter.
PINEAPPLE – PIONEER
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
Said one old Transvaal pioneer:
"There's no place for luxuries here.
You can't load your cart
With pineapple tart
Or fill it with kegs of Dutch beer".
SPIRE – SPRINGTIME
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
In springtime, we sang in a choir.
The church had a picturesque spire
And statues of martyrs
In breeches and garters.
Alas, the acoustics were dire.
KICKER – KNOW
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
The coach grabbed some charts and unrolled them,
Then gathered his players and told them:
"I know, a good kicker
Would help us score quicker.
I had some great guys, but I sold them!"
DRAWBACK – DRENCHED
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
I didn't stay here and complain
About being drenched yet again.
I flew off to Crete,
But the blistering heat
Was a drawback — I yearned for some rain.
OBSESSED – OBTAINED
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
A student of mine was obsessed
With finishing top in a test.
But having obtained
Full marks, she complained:
"I still feel profoundly depressed".
TEMPLE – TENNIS
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
A young British tourist called Dennis
Encountered a temple near Venice.
Between two brick walls
The priests batted balls
In a rite that resembled Real tennis.
UNLUCKY – UNMISTAKABLE
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
That dull, unmistakable sound
Is a jump jockey hitting the ground.
All riders are plucky,
But some are unlucky
And find themselves hospital-bound.
REVISION – REX
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
A school board approved a revision
Of history, with its decision
To use the word 'Rex'
Regardless of sex
In textbooks. This caused much derision.
PENTHOUSE – PERCOLATE
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10
Pooh-Bah
|
|
Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,454 Likes: 10 |
My well-dressed conservative friend
Insisted: "The money I spend
Will percolate down
To the paupers in town
From my penthouse in London's West End".
ALDERMAN – ALIVE
Last edited by A C Bowden; 10/04/2021 12:44 AM.
|
|
|
|
|
