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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 10,951 Likes: 2
Carpal Tunnel
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OP
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 10,951 Likes: 2 |
RARITY - RASP
Our limericks come with such rarity,
And they show a profound lack of clarity.
With a rasp in our voice
Do we now make a choice
Among grossness, or sex, or hilarity...
REPARTEE - REVOKE
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Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,390 Likes: 8
Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,390 Likes: 8 |
The Church was induced to revoke
Its ban on archbishops who joke.
Since then, on TV,
We've heard repartee
From sundry episcopal folk.
CANDLE � CAPACIOUS
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Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,390 Likes: 8
Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,390 Likes: 8 |
They told me the house was capacious,
But sadly that claim was fallacious.
The doors had no handle,
The light was by candle,
And floorboards were missing. Good gracious!
FERRY � FEVERISH
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Joined: May 2010
Posts: 963
old hand
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old hand
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 963 |
The Exxon Valdez � now a ferry �
Transports those more cheapskate than wary.
At the bridge, dude is feverish,
Runs her over a beaver �squish!
But no oil's spilled: it's sanitary.
GOUGE � GRAIN
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Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,390 Likes: 8
Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,390 Likes: 8 |
In Ivan the Terrible's reign,
Your views had to go with the grain.
If the Tsar or his minions
Disliked your opinions,
They'd gouge out a chunk of your brain.
TIGHTROPE � TINNY
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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 10,951 Likes: 2
Carpal Tunnel
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OP
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 10,951 Likes: 2 |
...not.
An aspiring conductor named Ginny
Had a musical ear that was tinny.
And she flew in a pet
When her best review yet
Called her "...certainly no Toscanini!"
HAPPILY - HAZARDOUS
Edit: Wha? No tightrope! Never mind. I'll try again later.
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Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,390 Likes: 8
Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,390 Likes: 8 |
An aspiring conductor named Ginny
Had a musical ear that was tinny.
A tightrope performer
Called down through a dormer:
"That noise makes me wobble, you ninny!"
HAPPILY � HAZARDOUS
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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 10,951 Likes: 2
Carpal Tunnel
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OP
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 10,951 Likes: 2 |
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Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,390 Likes: 8
Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,390 Likes: 8 |
I heard a spectator exclaim:
"This rugby's a hazardous game!
But back in my day,
I'd happily play �
We were light, and the risks weren't the same".
FLANK � FLOORBOARD
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Joined: May 2010
Posts: 963
old hand
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old hand
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 963 |
The car hurtled out from the bank,
Scraped the brick wall on its starboard flank.
Its speed was untoward;
Wheelman hit the floorboard
With his wingtips, so utterly swank.
BELITTLE � BEND
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