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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Aug 2001
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Here's a slightly different version of it. This is from Bartleby's, and is the version I have seen more commonly.
THOU shalt have one God only; who
Would be at the expense of two?
No graven images may be
Worshipped, except the currency.
Swear not at all; for, for thy curse
Thine enemy is none the worse.
At church on Sunday to attend
Will serve to keep the world thy friend.
Honor thy parents; that is, all
From whom advancement may befall.
Thou shalt not kill; but need’st not strive
Officiously to keep alive.
Do not adultery commit;
Advantage rarely comes of it.
Thou shalt not steal; an empty feat,
When it’s so lucrative to cheat.
Bear not false witness; let the lie
Have time on its own wings to fly.
Thou shalt not covet, but tradition
Approves all forms of competition.
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Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
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Thou shalt have one God to adore,
Or maybe fewer, but not more.
Worship no idols, for we know
The Lord's a jealous so-and-so.
Thou shalt not take his name in vain,
But other oaths incur no stain.
On Sundays, if engaged in sports,
Keep half thy mind on holy thoughts.
Thy parents merit thy respect,
But if they nag, thou mayst object.
Thou shalt not kill, unless thy king
Proclaims that war's a noble thing.
Adultery's a moral flaw,
But, strangely, not against the law.
Thou shalt not steal; but on the Left
They say that property is theft.
False witness thou shalt never bear;
CCTV is everywhere.
And covet not; but if this should
Prove hard, explain that greed is good.
Last edited by A C Bowden; 08/13/14 01:51 AM.
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OP
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Thou shalt not kill; but need’st not strive
officiously to keep alive.
What is life? Don't be silly, life doesn't begin and end with the individual. Life is a progressive process to eventually effect the purpose of being. People don't die. They live on through the people who follow them. Therefore...
life can be considered dead only when it stops contributing new information to the long living clade.
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Say AC, good show. Are you sure that you aren't a renowned somebody? Your writings seem much too polished for folks of the local ilk. Except for maybe Wofa and Tromboniator and three others.  Just kidding but your post above is brilliant.
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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Well done, A C.
You have a real flair for this :-) !
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No matter what people tell you, words and ideas can change the world.
- Robin Williams
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"The man who does not do his own thinking is a slave,
and is a traitor to himself and his fellow men."
Robert G. I_______
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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It's been almost a week. I looked it up. Sorry. "The man who does not do his own thinking is a slave,
and is a traitor to himself and his fellow men."
Robert G. Ingersoll ------------------------- "These are the only ones of which the news has come to Harvard, And there may be many others but they haven't been discovered," -- Tom L______ (There were 104 at the time, and I think we're now up to 119. It's truly elementary.)
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old hand
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old hand
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"These are the only ones of which the news has come to Harvard,
And there may be many others but they haven't been discovered," It's an extraordinary feat of cleverness. For something in the neighborhood of fifty years I've been meaning to memorize that whole thing, but I'm always too busy learning lines for some play, or music for a concert. Now is no exception.
Last edited by Tromboniator; 08/22/14 10:59 AM.
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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Somehow there's nothing elegant or even remotely attractive about rhyming " Ununenium " in the Major-General's song, as Tom Lehrer did with the first 104 elements.
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