these sorts of discussion is/are prezactly why I could never abide sentence diaphragm[m]ing.

Back in the day, I really enjoyed sentence diagramming, especially sentences in the wild, rather than the tawdry little sample sentences in our grammars and workbooks. I first learned the traditional, Reed-Kellogg system (link), but then later as an undergraduate was exposes to the various flavors of directed acyclical graphs of generative grammar (link) schools of linguistic theory.

Ceci n'est pas un seing.