|
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655
addict
|
|
addict
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655 |
A twisted old cowboy named Campbell
Walked his trusty mare into the bramble.
They did something strange
In their home on the range.
But no details: I'm starting to ramble.
INCORRIGIBLE - INDEBTED
"I don't know which is worse: ignorance or apathy. And, frankly, I don't care." - Anonymous
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 725
old hand
|
|
old hand
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 725 |
Bernard had an attitude horrible:
His teachers had pegged him incorrigible;
But the girls that he petted
Were thoroughly indebted
For his kiss and caress so explorable.
COWHERB -- CRACK
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 41
newbie
|
|
newbie
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 41 |
He's been up the Mekong and back,
fought off a guerrilla attack,
now in the suburb
he fights with the cowherb
that grows in a small sidewalk crack.
SHOVE - SHRIEK
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 725
old hand
|
|
old hand
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 725 |
Rinaldo had fallen in love
With the woman who lived up above
He climbed up, took a peek,
Slipped and fell with a shriek
And discovered the force of her shove.
CARRIER PIGEON -- CARTOUCHE
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655
addict
|
|
addict
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655 |
Thanks CB, I couldn't think of anything for those two words that would be rated with fewer than three X's.
Karl primped his Mercedes so much he
Was known for it throughout the duchy.
When a carrier pigeon
Befouled it a smidgen,
He declared it a tragic cartouche.
And, for the more traditional-minded among us...
As Abdul ate baba ganoush
In Luxor beside a cartouche,
A carrier pigeon
Befouled him a smidgen,
Its turds whizzing by with a whoosh.
RUMMER - RUNDLE
"I don't know which is worse: ignorance or apathy. And, frankly, I don't care." - Anonymous
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655
addict
|
|
addict
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655 |
This is not an entry in the ongoing limerickage taking place on this thread. I just couldn't resist...
I suspect this may trigger some howls.
(Know my tongue is set firm in both jowls.)
Some think it uplifting
To talk about "shifting,"
But they really are moving their vowels.
"I don't know which is worse: ignorance or apathy. And, frankly, I don't care." - Anonymous
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 5,295
Carpal Tunnel
|
|
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 5,295 |
We all sing the way we are be(a)cked
And may all think our singing's perfèct
To some the *taste lacks
To seek needles in haystacks
And prefer shifting sounds for their act.
*or time
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 41
newbie
|
|
newbie
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 41 |
Up a ladder went poor Steve Mundle
With shingles, but he missed a rundle.
His death was a bummer,
To him raise a rummer...
and next time use a lift for a bundle.
LEVERAGE - LIBEL
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655
addict
|
|
addict
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655 |
While seducing the comely Miss Sevridge,
Old Willy applied lusty leverage.
She withstood all his libel
And oaths on the Bible,
But succumbed to a drug in her beverage.
PASTORAL - PATENT
"I don't know which is worse: ignorance or apathy. And, frankly, I don't care." - Anonymous
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 725
old hand
|
|
old hand
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 725 |
Alone in a meadow pastoral,
Don sat with Monica Morrell.
His motives were patent;
Her lust was not latent
And they got down to matters immoral.
TALKATIVE - TAMPER
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655
addict
|
|
addict
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655 |
New hubby wasn't real talkative.
As for parenting, let's say he was balkative.
When it came time to tamper
With junior's full Pampers,
Daddy became downright walkative.
SANITORIUM - SANDHI
"I don't know which is worse: ignorance or apathy. And, frankly, I don't care." - Anonymous
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 725
old hand
|
|
old hand
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 725 |
Oh! I laughed out loud at that one!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655
addict
|
|
addict
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655 |
Thanks. I approach them with that goal in mind, so I can chalk up at least one success!
I couldn't think of a single word to rhyme with "talkative." Is there such a word?
"I don't know which is worse: ignorance or apathy. And, frankly, I don't care." - Anonymous
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655
addict
|
|
addict
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655 |
Whether average or valedictorian,
Our posters don't let their past worry'em.
Didja ever think Blondie
Would notice a sandhi?
Well, it happens in our sanitorium!
DEATHBED - DEBUT
"I don't know which is worse: ignorance or apathy. And, frankly, I don't care." - Anonymous
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 725
old hand
|
|
old hand
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 725 |
Suzanne was a regular Meth Head
Who drew crazy cartoons like Berke Breathed.
But her artwork’s debut
Was received with a “boo”
And her studio turned into her deathbed.
WHIMPER - WHISKER
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655
addict
|
|
addict
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655 |
Old Katie let Beauregard pimp her,
Though her johns couldn't be any limper.
'Twas a financial risk: her
Great stench and her whisker
Would cause them to shudder and whimper.
INFAMY - INFIELD
"I don't know which is worse: ignorance or apathy. And, frankly, I don't care." - Anonymous
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 725
old hand
|
|
old hand
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 725 |
Fortune and fame was their destiny
'Til their drug use came under much scrutiny.
Stars of the infield:
Canseco and Sheffield,
Joined Bonds and McGwire in infamy.
CLOSE CALL -- CLOVE
Last edited by Coffeebean; 05/13/2010 8:03 PM.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655
addict
|
|
addict
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655 |
To my pot-bellied pig I've grown close.
Call his name, and he wiggles his nose.
Now bake ham in the stove
With brown sugar and clove,
And tell me you don't think it's gross.
EXPLORER - EXPRESSLY
"I don't know which is worse: ignorance or apathy. And, frankly, I don't care." - Anonymous
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 11,613
Carpal Tunnel
|
|
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 11,613 |
Christopher was an explorer.
Isabella: did he adore her!
But his ship, it did sink.
It was not in the pink,
Due expressly to the emerald ash borer.
GALLEY--GANDER
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 9,971 Likes: 3
Carpal Tunnel
|
|
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 9,971 Likes: 3 |
Way to bring History into the modern day! Hurrah!
----please, draw me a sheep----
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 725
old hand
|
|
old hand
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 725 |
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 11,613
Carpal Tunnel
|
|
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 11,613 |
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 9,971 Likes: 3
Carpal Tunnel
|
|
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 9,971 Likes: 3 |
----please, draw me a sheep----
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 5,295
Carpal Tunnel
|
|
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 5,295 |
Three ! I like that one too!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655
addict
|
|
addict
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655 |
Four! I like it, too (Of course I do - I'm an entomologist!)
"I don't know which is worse: ignorance or apathy. And, frankly, I don't care." - Anonymous
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655
addict
|
|
addict
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655 |
It would be rather hard just to tally
All the dishes Bob scrubbed in the galley.
But please take a gander
At him wielding that sander,
On the pots that he found in the alley!
LEISURELY - LENS
"I don't know which is worse: ignorance or apathy. And, frankly, I don't care." - Anonymous
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 11,613
Carpal Tunnel
|
|
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 11,613 |
Not LEISURELY Robert did grumble
When his LENS it did take a long tumble;
All the way to the sea.
"Woe is me, woe is me;
No pictures, all thanks to that fumble".
KNOCKWURST--KRYPTON (Good luck with this one.)
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655
addict
|
|
addict
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655 |
My favorite kind of knockwurst
Is the brand that I tasted at first.
Sure as krypton's a gas,
Other brands didn't pass,
'Cause they all were not better, but wurst.
(I love a challenge.)
POSSESSION - POSTILION
"I don't know which is worse: ignorance or apathy. And, frankly, I don't care." - Anonymous
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 9,971 Likes: 3
Carpal Tunnel
|
|
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 9,971 Likes: 3 |
Well, you certainly are up to it!
----please, draw me a sheep----
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 5,295
Carpal Tunnel
|
|
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 5,295 |
When he came in posession
Of estates in degression
To upgrade his dominion
he became a postilion
while asking his peers for discretion
BARITONE BURGONET
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655
addict
|
|
addict
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655 |
Whether baking a loaf, roll or scone,
Andy'd sing in his rich baritone.
O'er his hair, not a net
But a true burgonet:
Bread and opera he offered Simone.
SUDOR - SUGAR
"I don't know which is worse: ignorance or apathy. And, frankly, I don't care." - Anonymous
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 725
old hand
|
|
old hand
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 725 |
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 5,295
Carpal Tunnel
|
|
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 5,295 |
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655
addict
|
|
addict
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655 |
I'll let her know that 
"I don't know which is worse: ignorance or apathy. And, frankly, I don't care." - Anonymous
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 9,971 Likes: 3
Carpal Tunnel
|
|
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 9,971 Likes: 3 |
It seems to me Andy also benefited very well!
----please, draw me a sheep----
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655
addict
|
|
addict
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655 |
"I don't know which is worse: ignorance or apathy. And, frankly, I don't care." - Anonymous
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 11,613
Carpal Tunnel
|
|
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 11,613 |
I had to look up the word sudor;
then I wanted to run for the true door.
Sugar'd make it taste worse;
I would want to curse,
"Bleah! This stuff tastes worse than crude ore."
UNDERACHIEVE--UNION
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655
addict
|
|
addict
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655 |
When asked at his high school reunion,
The ne'er-do-well Farhat Khartounian
Said to all, "I believe
I shall underachieve
As I did in our bleak student union!"
DRAFT - DRAM
"I don't know which is worse: ignorance or apathy. And, frankly, I don't care." - Anonymous
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655
addict
|
|
addict
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 655 |
A penurious drunkard named Sam
Was well know for his signature scam:
He'd slip crud in his draft
(While his buddies all laughed)
So the bartender'd spot him a dram.
MAJESTY - MAKER
"I don't know which is worse: ignorance or apathy. And, frankly, I don't care." - Anonymous
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 41
newbie
|
|
newbie
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 41 |
When I say this, I don't mean to boast, but I travel a lot more than most. Between work and my kin there's no time to log in to read here, much less to post!! 
|
|
|
|
|
