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Remember "accismus"? "Feigning lack of interest in something offered while actually desiring it", i.e., "Oh, I couldn't possibly!" "You're too kind!" "You shouldn't have!"
I wonder whether or not there is a term for its "opposite". Its opposite might be thought of as feigning the desire to give something while actually hoping the offer is refused. Often both parties share an unspoken knowledge that the offer is merely a gesture, and that it would not be the done thing to accept it.
An example. Let there be two friends, A and B. A is flat broke.
B: I know your funds are somewhat—
A: (Lugubriously): Yes.
B (Reluctantly): Things are a bit tight for me too, but I suppose...
A: (Raising traffic-stopper's palm): No, no. But thanks for offering.
Any suggestions?
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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We do have a phrase for the result of this, when your offer is turned down you say you've 'saved your nickel.'
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stranger
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stranger
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There's a fairly common scenario where negative signals are given in a "positive" form.
Example: You've spent the day with friends and they are dropping you off at your house. One party, usually the husband, not knowing the code says "com'on in for dinner (or a beer)". The other, usually the wife, knowing that the house is a mess and that she was preparing leftovers for dinner says, "Oh yes, won't you come in". The husband of the couple dropping you off says, "sure", however, the wife of the couple dropping you off, also knowing the code, immediately says "oh thank you very much, but we have to get back". That usually ends it. I've always known this process as "knowing the social code", but there may be a better, more concise, term.
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Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
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I was thinking of "obligated" for saying yes but hoping they decline but you're right. Both have to know the code.
PS welcome.
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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Fascinating concept, Hydra. I wish I knew more about the origins of words. My guess is that it's based on Latin, but.
I'm wondering about coining a word to fit your meaning: would "decismus" make any sense at all, etymologically?
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It's originally from a Greek word "akkismos" (coyness).
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I'm wondering about coining a word to fit your meaning: would "decismus" make any sense at all, etymologically? Well I'm no expert on etymology, but I like it.  I like that your coinage is similar to accismus, because the one is often a reaction to the other, isn't it. A knows B doesn't really want to help A paint his living room, despite the offer, and so A responds to decismus with accismus.
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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It's originally from a Greek word "akkismos" (coyness). Ah--thanks, Myr. (By the way, I still "owe" you for that joke of several days ago, sir!) Coyness made me think of slyness as something of an opposite, so I looked it up: slyness
1. [n] shrewdness as demonstrated by being skilled in deception.
Synonyms
craft craftiness cunning foxiness guile wiliness
Related terms
Type of shrewdness link Possibly a coinage could be made from the root of one of these words...[shrug]
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