I can't resist a good invitation. So here goes (groan in advance)

Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you but don't start anything."

Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.

A dyslexic alcoholic walks into a bra.

A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says, "A beer please, and one for the road."

And, finally, there was the person who sent fifteen different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least ten of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.