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Joined: Dec 2000
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Dec 2000
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Upon hearing someone utter an unintentional, and probably best not worth mentioning, pun, and saying, "No pun intended."
Replying, "None taken."
Well, OK. Maybe "great" is overstating it a little.
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Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 866
old hand
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old hand
Joined: Nov 2000
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I worked (in Oz) with a "good ol' boy" geologist from Tucson some years ago. He had a whole collection of sayings which kept me in fits of laughter, so much so that I wrote them all down and try to use them as often as possible - complete with good ol' boy accent of course!! I presume they weren't his own, but I've not heard them elsewhere. Examples are:
"Well, ain't that just slicker'n cat shit on linoleum!" (or substitute the cat dung reference for "snot on a brass door handle!").
If there was a lot of something, it was "ass-hole deep to an 8 foot Indian".
Finally, and showing my geoscience roots again, LURV the bumper sticker-esque saying I noted at a mineral and fossil dealer's website the other day...."COPROLITES HAPPEN".
Look it up!
stales
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Joined: Aug 2000
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 3,409 |
Thanks for your consideration, maverick, it is very much appreciated. However, I'm not quite that sensitive. I woould not like to think my personal mores were intruding others' freedom of expression. 
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Joined: Aug 2000
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Aug 2000
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DAMN I wish was as quick thinking as that! Ted, that was exceptional, at least the equal of any of the other offerings in this thread.
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Joined: Jul 2000
Posts: 3,467
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Jul 2000
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>DAMN I wish was as quick thinking as that!
Uh, well, among friends, I will make an admission. I had a whole week to come up with that. I will admit, though, that I very carefully chose the timing of the delivery for maximum amusement effect. My pappy taught me that in delivery and sex timing is everything. Pappy was a wise man.
TEd
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Joined: Oct 2000
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veteran
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veteran
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 1,346 |
Water? I never touch the stuff - fish f*ck in it
Mav, that should have been the least of his worries.
Given the initials W.C., you'd have expected him to suss that one.
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Joined: Oct 2000
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veteran
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veteran
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 1,346 |
I want to die in my sleep, like my grandpa; not yelling and screaming like his passengers.Likewise, love that one bel I'd heard it with a "peacefully" just after "die" which adds a certain hmmm, I don't know, je ne sais quoi I suppose.  P.S. The "you are drunk sir, very drunk" I'd heard attributed to Lady Astor (rather than Bessie wotsit) and Churchill.
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Joined: Oct 2000
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veteran
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veteran
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 1,346 |
Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?Here's a variant, Cap.. A renowned wag at work (call him Bill), on seeing another colleague (Ben) walking back from the canteen with a banana in his pocket, piped up: "Is that a banana in your pocket, Ben, or are you pleased to see me?" to which came the reply: "It's a banana, Bill - I'm never pleased to see you." Blinding. 
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Joined: Dec 2000
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Dec 2000
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Her name was Nancy Witcher Langhorne. She is also reputed to have referred to the soldiers who took part in the invasion of Italy as D-Day Dodgers (or at least something that could be interpreted with that phrase) and got a mention in the song D-Day Dodgers to honour* the occasion.
*Brit spelling to honor the fact that she was a Brit, as were the D-Day Dodgers.
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Joined: Apr 2000
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 3,065 |
I think she came from the US, but married an Englishman.
Bingley
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