We the disadvantaged can still be swathed in the myronic:

pertaining to mustard seeds...the acid of which can be used in mustard plasters with which we may swathe ourselves. Leastways, that's what the people did in the olden days.

And were you to try to obtain an unguent made from mustard seed derivatives, you might in a metropolis buy such an unguent from a myropolist, who specializes in perfurmes and unguents.