By the way i wouldn't be at all opposed to being Paris Hilton

Wanting to trade places with her isn't the same thing as wanting to imitate her by buying her hautepourri or her hautepothesis on life.

Or buying a Burger King meal to get a cardboard tiara for your kid.

Reminds me of a story about Sophia Loren who was in tears over the loss of some diamond jewellery stolen from her hotel room. A friend told her "Sophie, never cry over anything that can't cry over you."

Sophie tells this story on herself.

Now there is a real queen!

This also reminds me of the time I jumped on a full bus. There was one seat left at the back of the bus. It was a plastic seat with a moulded butt cavity which was half-filled with a clear fluid, possibly water but who knows. [It wasn't raining outside.]

I stood up until a seat further up in the bus became available. When I returned to the rear exit to get off at my stop, I noticed that there was an elderly gentleman sitting in the seat with the water in it.

I said "There was water in that seat." He replied without hesitation and with utter seriousness:

"Not any more."

I couldn't stop thinking about that old gentleman's reply. He wasn't being clever with me. This is how he absorbs the insults of everyday life.