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Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 7,210
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 7,210 |
I only chase fly ballsmust.. resist.. temptation... 
formerly known as etaoin...
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 13,858
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 13,858 |
Dear etaoin: You just flunked entomology 101. But the subject of male fly genitalia reminds me of the seventh grade. The son of the proprietor of the Chinese laundry taught us an amusing prank. He could catch a fly with a
sweep of the hand, open his hand cautiously, and from
the color of the eyes tell the males from the females.
If he had a male fly, he would change his hold carefully,
until the posterior tip of the abdomen was in view, with a
little yellow protuberance, the male sex organ. Using his
fingernail as tweezers, he would pluck the end off this, and
attach a two inch long narrow triangle of cigarette paper to
the sticky goo exposed, and release the fly, which would zoom off trailing the cigarette paper behind it. The teacher was very nearsighted, and would see the paper when the fly lit on the window, and try to pick it up. The fly would zoom away, leaving the teacher with a comically bewildered look on her face.
But finally she found a dead one,and got a good look at it.
After that just a sweep of the hand could get you detention.
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Joined: Jul 2000
Posts: 3,467
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Jul 2000
Posts: 3,467 |
Saint PETA is gonna git you!
TEd
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 619
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OP
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 619 |
just a sweep of the hand could get you detention
It got the fly penissection. [In fact, it turned him into a "flapper".]
A gnat's life is not all it seems
He can land in a mess or in cream
What gives others displeasure
Is how he takes measure
Of his only claim to esteem.
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 619
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 619 |
I have finally come to my senses.Someone condemned my postings as "so dreary" and it sent me into a bit of a tailspin. I almost gave up on myself. Then I discovered my true nature as a "gadfly", and I recognize that the criticism was perfectly valid. A gadfly can suffer anything but a torpid review. From now on, I'm going to focus on doing what comes gnaturally. No more social graces and those "dreary" thoughtful airs!
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 13,858
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 13,858 |
Dear grapho: You remind me of a weekend my wife and I camped out close to Moosehead Lake. On the bulletin board
of the first campsite we stopped at was a message that the
blackflies were gone. But when my wife went "to admire Nature" I heard her scream. Noseeums by the millions,
hitting below the belt. We had forgotten to bring insect
repellent. We drove almost forty miles before we found a
small store open late where we could get repellent. Those
damned noseeums are so tiny they can fly in formation through mosquito netting. Don't provoke members to apply
repellent to you.
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 619
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 619 |
Don't provoke members to apply repellent to you.Good advice, wwh. But I never bite unless bitten. That makes me a lot less pugnatious than those noseeums of yours. Just for the record, noseeums are not members of the Tabanidae family. Gnats of our lineage are far more discriminating than noseeums in choosing our targets. For instance, we would never target either you or your wife, wwh, your Carpal Tunnel status notwithstanding. Besides that, what is "repellent" to a noseeum is salivation to a gnat.
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 619
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OP
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 619 |
what is repellent to a noseeum is salivation to a gnatA gnat is nobody's fool He is subject to nobody's rule You can swing You can swat But it's all for naught 'Cause a gnat is nobody's fool. A gnat has his place in the sun You can live with a gnat, or run If you run, he's beside you Or even astride you 'Cause a gnat has his place in the sun.
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 13,858
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 13,858 |
The next worse gnats were those at Monument Beach at low
tide. I'd have outboard motor in one hand, fishing tackle
in other hand, and no way to defend myself.
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 619
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OP
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 619 |
no way to defend myselfLet this be a lesson to all However your station so tall A gnat can outpace you And even outgrace you Precisely because he's so small.
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