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While searching for "illation" I found this, which could
make a moderately snappy retort: "That's illachrymable my dear."
Illacrymable
Il*lac"ry*ma*ble (?), a. [L. illacrimabilis; pref. il- not + lacrimabilis worthy of tears.] Incapable of weeping. [Obs.] Bailey.
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