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The idiot also known as Capfka ...
wife "I think so , yes"
man "......do you think you could.......marry?"
wife " if i was in love , yes i think i could"
man "would you sleep with him in this bed?"
wife "he would be my husband so i dont see why not"
man " would you er...............give him my golf clubs?"
wife " no dear,........he's left-handed"
the Duncster
the Duncster
stales
A Texan, a guy from Illinois, and a Michiganian are riding horses out on the range. The Texan, just to show off, pulls an expensive bottle of whiskey out of his saddlebag, takes a couple drinks, throws the bottle in the air, pulls out his gun and shoots it in midair. The guy from Illinois is shocked and asks "What are you doing? That's a perfectly
good bottle of whiskey!" The Texan replies, "In Texas, there's plenty of whiskey and bottles are cheap!"
A little while later, not wanting to be outdone, the guy from Illinois pulls out a bottle of champagne, takes a few sips, throws the bottle into the air, pulls out his gun and shoots it, just like the Texan. The guy from Michigan can't believe it. "What are you doing? That was a very expensive bottle of champagne!" With a wink to the Texan he says "In
Chicago, there's plenty of champagne and bottles are cheap."
About 15 minutes later, the Michiganian pulls out a bottle of beer. He opens it and takes a sip. Then chugs the rest of the bottle. He then places the bottle back in his saddlebag, pulls out his gun and shoots the guy from Illinois.
The Texan is visibly shaken. "What did you do that for?!?!" And the Michiganian says, "Well, in Michigan, we have plenty of people from Illinois, and bottles are returnable."
I merely cut and paste
Completely unrealistic, Connie. No one from Illinois would ever want to live in Michigan.
[just kidding -e]
An Ojibwa Folk Tale
As told by Katharine Judson
Once an Ottawa hunter and his wife lived on the shores of Lake Michigan. Then the hunters went south, toward the end of the
lake, to hunt. When he reached the lake* where he had caught beaver the year before, it was still covered with ice. Then he
tapped the ice to find the thinner places where the beaver families lived. He broke holes at these weaker points in the ice, and
went to his wigwam to get his traps.
Now the hunter's wife chanced to pass one of these holes and saw a beaver on the ice. She caught it by the tail and called to
the hunter to come and kill it quickly, before it could get back into the water.
"No," said the hunter, "if I kill this beaver, the others will become frightened. They will escape from the lake by other openings
in the ice."
Then the woman became angry, and they quarreled.
When the sun was near setting, the hunter went out on the ice again, to set more traps. When he returned to his tepee, his wife
had gone. He thought she had gone to make a visit. The next morning she had not returned, and he saw her footprints. So he
followed her trail to the south. As he followed her trail, he saw that the footprints gradually changed. At last they became the
trail of a skunk. The trail ended in a marsh, and many skunks were in that marsh.
Then he returned to his people. And he called the place, "The Place of the Skunk**."
* [Between Milwaukee and Chicago, going south where Chicago now stands.]
** Which apparently is the translation of the word Chicago... yes, the word has undergone some small changes in spelling and
pronunciation... no, I don't have the original spelling on-hand.
I too, copied and pasted. Nothing personal, Keiva. I had many good times at Chicago USO.
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