I concur with my convict-descended comrades
..whilst not exactly being "thick as thieves".
Wasn't that the title of a Split Enz album?

tea of any sort is foul devilspawn
Speaking as someone with a tendency towards volume drinking, I have to say that I'd be a nervous wreck inside a week or two if I had to replace tea with coffee. Tea may have more caffeine, but it's never given me the shakes.

"Self-discipline"? What's that?