> Is it an offence to be drunk in charge of a bicycle if you are a fish?

There has been the odd occasion I've worried about this one (getting caught, I mean, as it's undoubtedly an offence). I usually come to the conclusion that as long as you can cycle in a straight line you're OK. If you're unsure whether you're cycling in a straight line or not, you're probably not OK. Only problem is you need to ride the bike to assess your ability to assess your straight-line cycling abilities.

Personally I think cycle tracks, and indeed the edge of all roads, should have a nice bike-wheel size groove built in, so us fish can drink as much as nature dictates without qualm.