Ha!- some lovely ones, thanks!

I came across a drink container recently that admonished me to
Stand upright in a cool place

which seems to confirm a similar view:
Do not stand in direct sunlight

My dad reminds me of the instruction which made him think of Jonah and the whale:
If accidentally swallowed, consult a doctor
Fair enough - sounds good advice (is there a sturgeon in the house?)
Concerning swallowing, I like the beer bottle that comands:
Remove cap before swallowing
- how do they know what I'm wearing!

On the general 'road' theme I have seen
Joe's Body Works
which must be reassuring!

And the local UK roadworks sign (which-may-not-translate-if-you-are-reading-this-in-a-country-without-glass-reflectors-in-the-roads) which offered the rather cruella
Cats' Eyes Removed

But the animals get their own back: I have seen a sign on a gate warning visitors:
Dog Loose Inside!