Oh, Helen, I am rolling! Thank you for posting these! Couple comments:
the mc stands for the introduction of his guests for the evening.
Well, of course--it would be impolite to remain seated.

a mathematical manipulation by which a chinchilla turns into a coat.
Gosh, that's nothing--every time I come home, I turn into my driveway; no math involved!

Parthenogenesis is the creation of Greek architecture.
It isn't?

The hypotenuse is a type of syringe that holds 10 shots.
This one took me a minute...